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One of the best trends we’ve seen in online casinos over the last couple of years is a move towards the integration of games from multiple sources at many sites. By featuring games from a number of providers, players get to experience much more variety all in one location, making it easier to find sites that truly have a selection they’re happy with.
Winward Casino is an example of a casino site that has successfully combined two gaming suites into a single package to expand their offerings. Operated by Blacknote Entertainment Group and in operation since 1998, this site has a strong track record to go along with their slots and live games, as well as a solid promotional package that can be especially rewarding for high rollers.

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While Winward has used a variety of software providers over the years, they currently get a bunch of their game selection from Betsoft and Topgame as well as big brands such as NetEnt, Microgaming and Pragmatic Play, the mobile-focused software developers. That’s more than enough to get an excellent variety of slots out to their players, especially since the styles offered by those companies are very different.
If you've been playing for a while, you might be familiar with most of the software developers aboard the casino. Betsoft is known for their excellent 3D slots, each of which comes with top-notch animation, sound effects and voice acting, all of which combine to create an immersive, story-like experience.
Topgame’s selection may not be quite as visually impressive, but their titles cover a wide range of themes and play styles, guaranteeing that you’re likely to find at least a few games here that attract you.
There's plenty more to discover here. For example, Pragmatic Play, one of the industry-leading software developers known for its innovative approach has a presence at the casino with their mobile-optimized games. Equally fascinating NetEnt and Rival brands who have been serving the world's most prominent online casinos will delight you with their premium-quality virtual machines. Habanero is another brand that offers a seamless gameplay alongside world-class thrilling casino entertainment from Octopus Gaming.
All in all, Winward Casino offers a truly impressive selection with notable titles such as Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, Greedy Goblins, Weekend at Vegas, Event Horizon, Mega Gems, Vegas, Grave Grabbers, Lady of the Moon, Dice and Fire, and New Tales of Egypt.
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New players at Winward can take advantage of a two-part bonus offer that promises plenty of money to play within the casino. First, you can try the games without making any commitment using a sign-up bonus that will be credited to your account the moment you finish registering a new account. That bonus does come with some restrictions: there is a 20x wagering requirement.
If you are willing to make a deposit into the site, you’ll be greeted with even bigger rewards. Each of your first five deposits will come with a staggering matching bonus. While this bonus isn’t cashable, it does give you a lot of money that can be played within the casino, and you can withdraw any winnings you earn after meeting a 35x playthrough requirement on both the deposit and bonus amounts.
When attempting to clear these bonuses, it’s important to note that while slots contribute 100% of each bet to your requirement, other games will only contribute a fraction of each wager amount. Video poker bets contribute 20%, while table games and other options will clear your bonus more slowly, with blackjack offering the least at just a 2.5% contribution rate.

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Outside of slots, the game selection at Winward is quite impressive too. Most of the classic games are present, and there are some premium options that might be of interest to players. There's Double Exposure Blackjack, Common Draw Roulette, Live Dealer Super 6, 3D Live Dealer Baccarat, Casino War, Triple Edge Poker, Three Card Rummy, Weed Wacker, and Multi Hand All American Video Poker.
When it comes to standard table games, both roulette and blackjack are available in multiple versions such as Blackjack, American Roulette, European Roulette, Casino War, Baccarat, and Keno.
The site also has an ace up its sleeve in the form of live dealer games. You can play blackjack, baccarat, or roulette with real human beings and actual casino equipment from the comfort of your home. It all works over live video streaming, where you can watch the action unfold right in front of you.
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WinWard Casino Deposits and Withdrawals

Banking is easy at Winward Casino, as most of the options we are accustomed to seeing on sites can be utilized here as well. When it comes to funding your account, you can deposit via the major bank cards including Visa, MasterCard, and American Express. Or you can choose Bank Wire or even virtual currency, Bitcoin.
Withdrawals are straightforward too with winnings processed over the latest Secure Socket Layer (SSL) systems for speed and security.

Software Options

At Winward Casino, you can play the games on Android, Apple, and Windows-powered devices, as well as PC’s laptops and tablets. All your games can be accessed through a no download, an instant-play client that operates right in your web browser.
That means that you won’t have to put anything on your computer in order to take part in any games here: just make sure your web browser of choice is up to date.
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The Final Verdict

Winward’s game selection has its own set of pluses and minuses but we love the inclusion of live dealer options, and it is difficult to argue with their slots collection.
There’s a lot to like here: banking options are plentiful, and the welcome bonus package is one of the larger ones we’ve seen in a long time as well as efficient multi-lingual live chat customer support. With a reputable group running the site, this is an internet casino we’re happy to recommend to our readers.
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submitted by freespins1 to u/freespins1 [link] [comments]

Marchero

With two cryptocurrency integrations under my belt I've set out with a solid plan for Monero.
Instead of jumping in and figuring it out as I go along I want to make sure that I have the solutions I'll need, well defined and scoped out. It's a good thing I'm going this path, too.
Turns out that there isn't really much in the way of JavaScript code for Monero out there. Probably the two best (and possibly only), solutions at the moment are monero-javascript and MyMonero.
Although there's no official Monero JavaScript library, the monero-javascript project is probably the closest to the original C++ client. This derived code comes in the form of WebAssembly, a low-level language that runs a lot closer to the metal than JavaScript. This means that WebAssembly is generally faster when doing things like calculations, but with some trade-offs like ease of use. JavaScript is a lot easier to code and understand, but it tends to run slower. In modern browsers, both run side by side so developers can decide which parts need to work fast, and which parts need to be easier to change and maintain.
The MyMonero project is actually a set of supporting libraries for a Monero wallet. It seems to have a lot more "real world" mileage but has a smaller dev team and hasn't been updated for many months, unlike monero-javascript which was updated as recently as today. MyMonero also uses WebAssembly for some of the core wallet functionality but the "bindings", or how this functionality is exposed to JavaScript, are different.
Between the two solutions, I've had more luck in getting support for monero-javascript. Neither project is well documented so having someone to run questions by is, at least at this point, a winning feature.
This will be my first time working with WebAssembly so factoring in some learning time is prudent. I'll only be learning to use existing code rather than learning how to write it but still, it's a new thing for me.
As I mentioned, support for Monero via JavaScript is surprisingly rare, so I may end up contributing some original code back to the project(s) I'll be using. I haven't yet decided which of them will find its way into CypherPoker.JS because there are still some open questions about how certain things are done and if they're even possible. However, right now monero-javascript is looking like the best choice.
Once I'm satisfied that all the building blocks are viable, I'll add the cryptocurrency handler and integrate it all the way through to the front end. As with BTC and BCH, a Monero testnet option will be available along with a faucet so that you can test it out without using any actual XMR. A full client option that uses the downloadable monerod client, the equivalent of a full Bitcoin node, will be available alongside the "light" option which will use external APIs. After that I'll upgrade the live demo (and server), update the wallet generator, post v0.5.2 code documentation, create a new release, and write a wrap-up post.
I want to stress again that this is all contingent on whether or not the JavaScript libraries actually do what I need them to do, and if there exists at least one public API that can be used in place of the daemon (monerod). But based on the help I've received from the Monero community so far I'm feeling optimistic.
Probably the most interesting thing about the Monero integration is that it represents the final, Rumsfeldian, "known unknown" of the CypherPoker.JS project. It's the last thing I'm embarking on with essentially zero prior knowledge; I know that I know nothing.
The rest of the project, the other cryptocurrencies, smart contracts, peer-to-peer communications - those are all things I'd at least had an introduction to if not outright practical knowledge of. When it comes time to add Ethereum support I'll be able to confidently say that it's nothing new. Incorporating Tor anonymization ... been there, done that.
When it comes to Monero, though, I'm a wide-eyed ignoramus. Never owned any XMR, never ran a Monero wallet, never tried out a Monero block explorer; seems I'm even getting some of the technical terminology wrong. Basically, it's the last part of the project's core vision that comes with a steep learning curve and a not-insignificant chance of failure. I mean, I don't think I'm gonna fail but I can't point to any definitive reason why I should think that.
There's no pragmatic reason to believe that March and (the) Monero (integration) will be contemporaneous but then again, why not?
submitted by monican_agent to cypherpoker [link] [comments]

Rise and Fall Part 9

Part 8 (has access to parts 1-7 in it)
For some reason it would not post the last day or so.
It is early 2017. I have been carrying on my usual playing 10-20 hours a week to survive. Still lethargic is best term I suppose. I just dont get excited to play anymore. I consider getting a job to remind me how shitty working is so it gives me a kick in the teeth to play poker. Then it dawns on me, I hate playing poker now.
Poker has been tainted. Everything bad that happened to me I can associate with poker. The rise and fall was poker (the fall part). The oxycontin started as a performance enhancer to log more hours. Everything I consider to be wrong in my life I trace back to poker essentially, even if just a butterfly affect reason that had I done something else I wouldnt be here.
Hating poker is not the greatest realization considering its my only means to income outside of grunt labor. I seek a job in a couple places to no avail which was fine, I didnt wanna do that either.
Several months earlier I had started playing on SWC (bitcoin site) and became familiarized with bitcoin. Thought nothing of it, it was just the currency I was winning or losing. I dont read a thing about it, I learn nothing of it. I wasnt playing a ton or even big stakes, my intention for playing online was to just stay sharp in case it ever comes back full fledge. I have 5-6 btc on this site at the most (2-3k) and I flush it playing plo and big o not thinking much of it.
Back to 2017. Its March/April~ of 2017. I am playing cards one night dicking around probably had a couple drinks and was needling the usuals etc. A guy I do not know is in the game. Looks Russian. I bet he interfered in our election... fucking commies. I dont remember how I got to talking to him but crypto had been brought up. I talk about SWC. Tell him I had a few btc but not anymore. The only other thing I remember well from the conversation was bitching about going from an iphone4 (yes I had an iphone4 from 2010-17, the same one. It barely worked. Many oxycontins snorted off the back of that phone, texts dating back to when I got it in 2010) to the 6 or 7 or wtfever I have now, which is bigger and its harder to text and drive. He just responds by saying “first world problems are the worst”. Amen brother, those Africans and Venezuelans have no clue of our struggle.
I end up talking to him a bit and it turns out he mines crypto. Has a website that sells mining equipment. He has a hell of a back story too. I tell him I am interested in mining. I have about 20k to my name at this time and I realized recently that I dont like playing poker so why not? He eventually tells me not to do it. Regardless we become friends and he is ultimately the most important friend I have ever made. I have made more positive strides mentally since meeting him (mostly work ethic, realizations, reality checks and aspirations) As silly as it sounds, when he told me “first world problems are the worst” it stuck with me. He was saying it as a joke but jokes are funniest when true. He is genuinely the smartest guy I have ever associated with also. If you run into him at a poker table youd think he was a high functioning autist. Then you talk to him and go “ohhh hes just one of those Einstein type geniuses”. His hair is usually a mess, he cuts his own hair for or has his girlfriend do it. He wears cheap clothing usually since it all covers your ass or nipples I suppose. He virtually never instigates conversation with people he doesnt know. He is really deliberate with his actions. Talks really calmly and knows exactly what he is saying. He is just on the same level at all times it seems.
Meeting him has definitely changed my life for the better. We become friends pretty quickly. I know I went on a downer after meeting him because I couldnt afford to buy mining stuff and remember wanting to (again, he told me not to do it eventually anyways).
Which will lead me to another good friend to have. Between 2015 and this point in 2017 I have shot myself in the foot not logging hours a couple times. A friend has bailed me out with a loan or short term stake a few times. He is a well off restaurant owner who loves poker more than just about anything not related to him. Every time I see him we talk about hands he played and he just eats it up, has photographic memory and never butchers a hand history which is nice. He is as good hearted of a guy as I have ever met. (Sorry if this is getting long winded giving praise to people close to me, I intend on sharing with a few people and would like them to know what they mean to me as corny as that is because I suck at doing it in real life. Plus it is kinda gay to get mushy sounding in real life, but I digress. Theyve heard virtually none of the content of this whole thread either, a ton of this stuff I have never shared) In fact he is too kind hearted. He has helped people who wouldnt piss on him if he was on fire, and people have burned him on many occasions. My only complaint about this person is he never kicked my ass and told me to log more hours or fuck off. I needed it. If I just logged hours I wouldnt need the help. Its as simple as that. I have no leaks other than the unwillingness to play (leaks as in drugs/pit games/strippers/wtf ever else) and it has hindered me immensely over the these last couple years. (Ok I do have one embarrassing leak that has been fixed for a year and change, mobile games... I have spent like 30,000$ on mobile games between late 2016 and late 2018, Lords Mobile specifically clocked me for 20k. This definitely hindered my ability to build a roll and got me into a few jams. When youre not logging hours playing youre sitting around gaming and these games arent cheap obviously)
It is around May now and my friend who messes with crypto tells me that Bitcoin is going to 10,000$. Its like 800$ at the time iirc. I own a couple from Ignition cashouts. I kind of trust him. I cant argue him on it as I have literally no mental fortitude on the subject, but I essentially shrug it off. I start watching the price on poloniex and am watching prices jump like crazy. Light bulb in head! I can buy the dips sell the peaks and have more BTC! Lets load the 2.5btc I have onto poloniex! Sell peak but it keeps climbing... “FUCK! gotta get it back before it goes to 10k! Whew. Still have 2.45 BTC. FUCK! Its dropping! Get it out before it goes to zero!”
Yea I turned that 2.5 BTC into .4 BTC. No joke. I think I ended up throwing it onto SWC and losing it once it was almost gone. I honestly forget. I had nothing when it finally hit 20k other than some shit alts worth about 800$ at most (worth 35$ now but they still reside in my locked poloniex account, maybe I will give poloniex my ID if they ever become worth more than 1k)
So I am now annoyed I didnt turn every free dollar I had into BTC. I didnt trust the guy enough and to be fair I would have been using the money I play with. Had I met the guy a year earlier (know what I know of him now) I would probably have just locked it all up and sat around waiting.
I never really get my act together in 2017. I continuously log just enough hours to get by. I just dont care. I just want a way out of this. I catch myself saying “I hate playing poker” and sometime around the end of 17 or early 2018 I start trying to censor myself and quit saying that. Saying it will only make it fester deeper. I have to retrain myself to love poker. I remember the days of playing 18-24 hours straight because I love playing. I love watching for everything I can find to get an edge. I love a situation to present itself where I can step out of line. But now I just sit down and count the minutes before I can tell myself “way to go! You put in an 8 hour shift lets pack it in!” I leave good games often times. I celebrate when games break. This is where I am mentally while I play. I cant break out of it.
Late in 2017 a close friend of mine passes away. Will call him J. He was the guy who gave me a place to stay after the shutdown in Joplin. I was still doing oxy and he never once touched the stuff knowing what has happened to me. He doesnt judge me, he is somewhat of an enabler I suppose. He just drinks does shitty coke sometimes and has a script of adderol and xanax. Literally never once does he do any with me (ive warned him xanax and opiates will kill you if you mix, which is likely part of the reason he never did it) He was a marginal poker player (relative to modern game, he was just good enough to beat the rake live but he had too many pit leaks) and took great pride in being my friend (I was the slayer in the area for years leading up to this, anyone considered the best in their area can relate, you just have the respect of the local poker community). One of my earlier live poker memories involved him. I am like 18 or 19 playing a 1-2 game at a small casino and he was there with a friend. They were the good players in the game at the time. They were having a few drinks eating nice food and laughing having a good time. I remember thinking that I want this lifestyle. Care free gambling fast paced lifestyle. I had told him this story years later and he just ate it up, constantly tried to get me to rebound, but as I have stated many many times in the last few of these I have basically waved my white flag and accepted the result of my fall.
Anyhow after living with him we always talk every few months at minimal and have something to eat when we see each other at the casino. He was somewhat disingenuous sounding he was so nice and honestly it got to a point it started rubbing me the wrong way. I still talk to him of course but less frequently. In December of 2017 I get a phone call from my friend who owns the restaurant and he is distraught. He has been at the hospital and J has passed away. The back story on this is he had gotten a phone call from old friend who was getting out of prison in Arizona with no where to go (a female). J being as nice a guy as he is drives the 20+ hours to get her and gives her a place to stay. Well shes a junky and actually convinces J to do opiates/heroin. He overdoses and dies. I hadnt talked to him in a few months. I regret it. Had I known I would have beaten him senseless and got him to quit before things actually get bad.
Going to his funeral hit me up side the head too. The way I started feeling he was disingenuous just got destroyed. I cant fathom as many people showing up to my funeral with as nice of things to say. I wrote something to say but opt out after a few people say everything I had written (except better). I regret not saying them anyways. I think I still have what I wrote tucked away with the card and his money clip that made its way to me. I stumbled across his casino players card in a box one day and it resides in my wallet ever since. This was the first close friend that has passed away in my life, knock on wood. It woke me up a bit and caused a lot of self reflection because I felt I had let him down. I lived a few miles from him and didnt drop in to see him, didnt stay in contact as well as I should have. All because I felt he was disingenuously nice when he was actually just nice, which is actually because I am a cynical hermit who hates social life these days. That was the real reason I didnt stay closer. Him being too nice was just my excuse to blow him off essentially.
Only other thing I can add is that chick he helped out didnt even go to his funeral and on top of that had tried to take his truck and clean his house out. Junkies are the worst. I was a junky but I proudly say I never robbed anyone or cost anyone anything other than emotional distress, which isnt much of a brag obviously.
2018 starts and I have been decreasing my methadone every week for about 3-4 months now. I am on a low dose. Makes sleeping at night hard (get restless legs and sneezy). So I am having a few drinks any time I am at the casino playing (still just two days a week for the most part) to help get through those late night sessions when its worn off and I feel crummy. I get down to 15mg then 10mg and in March of 2018 I get asked if I wanna work for a week with my crypto friend. His friend is setting up a farm with 500 miners and needs help. I agree. The pay is in excess of the work (in my opinion) at 3k and I have no expenses, but I dont argue obviously. Before we leave town I have to pick up my week of methadone (at 4mg now) and so I do that. I never take any of them, I have the box still. Never opened it. They remain at my apartment as a reminder, the box carrying the 6 doses and a stack of receipts for every 75$ week that I kept in the box, several years worth, at least 9-10k worth of receipts, and that shits CHEAP compared to oxy. So I am finally off of opiates. I take kratom still but its essentially non addictive in comparison. Ill cede that I am reliant on kratom but if it disappeared tomorrow I wouldnt panic, I would be fine.
So I fly to Denver with my friend and meet his friends half brother who was instructed to rent a box truck and the three of us were to drive from Denver to Washington carrying like half a million dollars worth of hardware. Its early March, the roads arent exactly great. Half brother of his friend rents a truck with no middle seat though. Its absolutely miserable. Whoever sat middle was sitting like a fem boy legs closed and knees up high from the drive shaft hump. It was un fucking real how uncomfortable the middle was. So like I stated the roads were not great, we drove on ice for 5-6 hours straight (while my crypto friend did about 30 minutes of it before I decided I value my life and banned him from driving, he was literally doing over 70 on this ice sheet when I checked the gauge. I forget what he said, I will fail to make it sound as good but he said that he is protected and can not die, if we wreck he wont get hurt because of some universe stipulation that protects him. He said we would get hurt but he wouldnt. *** Ok here is what he said.
“quantum immortality. if i die in this universe, my conciousness will shift to others where i am still alive”
He just couldnt assure us ours would.
I end up driving like 18 of the 24 (one shot) hours it took as letting crypto friend drive was out. We make it set up a farm over a couple days then we go to Vegas. Not only do we go to Vegas but we fly a private jet. Not only do we take a private jet but his buddy has all four of us our own room at the Bellagio for 5-6 days. I remember having a 4500$ win at Bellagios 500$ cap 2-5 game... ran pretty salty. I only remember one hand worth bringing up, but I closed action and called 400$ pre with 67o with 3 others all in. Just flop 77X and send me the money. (Was drinking, gamble gamble). I cold called that also, some fish had opened massive and a 300$ stack just ripped a 400$ stack rejammed and I had called out of bb knowing fish will call off his 400~. This is actually a leak I have in poker. I will go over it because it has history.
Dating back to online my biggest leak was playing vs short stacks. Everyones biggest leak obv (6m setting). There were a few min buyers on Carbon and I got to the point I put them in pre every time they opened my bb from button, so long as they opened 75%+ from button or close to it. This has carried with me live, if I can gamble 3-4 ways (4 specifically) I will basically do it any time its 100bb~ or less with about 40% of hands if I can close action safely. I am a bit of a degenerate in this sense. I will flip for 1k if I have 10k to my name. It mostly came as a way to loosen up tables (the flipping blind preflop) at my local casino with players who give action. I am pretty snug in general but I cant refuse a flip when it presents itself and I cant refuse a fun gamble with short stacks.
I spend the month in Vegas during WSOP and run absurdly bad. Lose every big pot I play it seems. Switch to PLO the last half of the month and go a week straight without tripling my buy in up at any point. Just insane. Looking back I play rather poorly in PLO. I have been spoiled with my PLO games back home (which have been dead for about a year) and could get away with playing 50% of hands and no one ever bet big draws or anything not the nuts basically. I didnt adjust at all is what the issue was. Was just a frustrating month.
So I return and take a stake from a friend. I barely play still. Same ole same ole.
The last thing I will cover for this section is an incident late in 2018. One of the girls who is the floor at my local casino takes kratom also, we talk about it a fair amount. She has some 10mg percocets (mini oxycontins essentially) she gives me two of them. I havent had one in several years. I have been off methadone for 6-8 months at the time. I am eager to feel what I felt all those years ago, having no tolerance. So I take them home even though I know I shouldnt.
I get home and take both of them. What transpires is almost depressing. It frustrates me to no end that I realized that I have no desire for these. It affirms that all the money I flushed wasnt about the high, it was about the not withdrawing. I basically stated this in an earlier post but this is the event that I learned this from. I dont even enjoy it. I just sink knowing that I gave my life away for these. I have never recovered thanks to pain killers. Never once after 2011 have I ever looked in the mirror and said “finally, I have finally recovered what I fucked off”.
I am going to finish this thread off on the next post most likely. It will likely be long and take me a while to compose as it will cover my current year, and put a bow on it. The story basically climaxes a couple posts back, these surely have slowly lost their luster but I will finish them anyways. Nothing exciting about hearing about a guy who can beat games but wont sit in the chair to do it. Its a bit more upbeat in 2019 though andd I feel my future is bright and redemption nears though. I dont think I would have written these if not for a change of mentality recently, so look forward to a positive summary next post.
submitted by cisheteropatriarchy to poker [link] [comments]

Script Casino, Slot Machine Online Gaming Platform

Script Casino, Slot Machine Online Gaming Platform
Script Casino is a platform, where people can play online games (such as slot machine, blackjack, roulette, video poker and others). Games results are guaranteed to be absolutely random by using provably fair technology (based on strong cryptographic algorithms).

https://preview.redd.it/5kqam6452hk41.jpg?width=613&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=2b44d6cea3909ef4e1d37be47da70e54b31d241c

Who is it for

This application is for everyone (be it individual entrepreneurs or small organizations) who wants to quickly start their own online gaming business, but doesn’t have time and / or sufficient funds to develop a tailor made solution or buy expensive casino software packages from other vendors.

Why is it a great offer

  • Complete white label casino solution at an affordable price
  • Powered by the most robust and secure PHP Laravel framework
  • Life time updates
  • Professional support

Supported games

Fruits slot game is included into this package.
  • Multiple slot machines
  • Dice
  • European Roulette
  • American Roulette
  • Lucky Wheel / Wheel of Fortune
  • Baccarat
  • Blackjack
  • Video Poker
  • Keno
  • 75 Ball American Bingo
  • Raffle (Lottery)

https://preview.redd.it/b8qg8gv82hk41.jpg?width=1342&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=911531768154c9f77fad8b75ee7464fa16cf564a

Demo Script Casino:

https://preview.redd.it/onknpbet2hk41.png?width=906&format=png&auto=webp&s=55119161f01709f87ae395b8f08f198d427619bd
BUY AND INSTAN DOWNLOAD: https://jasaseo.be/product/script-casino/
1 license domain & Install Download

Updates Log’s – Jan 2020

- Perfect Money Gateway Added. - Bitcoin Payment Gateway Added. - Master Card Payment Gateway Added. - Multi Payment
submitted by sineadcortez to u/sineadcortez [link] [comments]

Jual Script Judi Online, Poker, Casino, Togel 1 Paket Website Langsung Online

Jual Script Judi Online, Poker, Casino, Togel 1 Paket Website Langsung Online
Script Casino adalah sebuah platform, di mana orang dapat bermain game online (seperti mesin slot, blackjack, roulette, video poker, dan lainnya). Hasil pertandingan dijamin benar-benar acak dengan menggunakan teknologi yang terbukti adil (berdasarkan algoritma kriptografi yang kuat)

https://preview.redd.it/8xn6pwz60hk41.jpg?width=613&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8a0b4e67eb79035b602cd9a29eb924adf40e373f

Untuk siapa ini

Aplikasi ini untuk semua orang (baik itu pengusaha perorangan atau organisasi kecil) yang ingin segera memulai bisnis game online mereka sendiri, tetapi tidak punya waktu dan / atau dana yang cukup untuk mengembangkan solusi yang dibuat khusus atau membeli paket perangkat lunak kasino mahal dari yang lain vendor.

https://preview.redd.it/yxp5silk2hk41.png?width=906&format=png&auto=webp&s=f56522e57d8f32ee250e7ea80fb05638810dd957
BUY AND INSTANT DOWNLOAD:
https://jasaseo.be/product/script-casino/
1 license domain & Install Download

Updates Log’s – Jan 2020

- Perfect Money Gateway Added. - Bitcoin Payment Gateway Added. - Master Card Payment Gateway Added. - Multi Payment
submitted by sineadcortez to u/sineadcortez [link] [comments]

Script Judi Online, Poker, Casino, Togel 1 Paket Website

Script Judi Online, Poker, Casino, Togel 1 Paket Website
Script Casino adalah sebuah platform, di mana orang dapat bermain game online (seperti mesin slot, blackjack, roulette, video poker, dan lainnya). Hasil pertandingan dijamin benar-benar acak dengan menggunakan teknologi yang terbukti adil (berdasarkan algoritma kriptografi yang kuat)

https://preview.redd.it/4iydk7bmxgk41.jpg?width=613&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8c9a10bae247f6bca51cb383fecfcdc128652125

Untuk siapa ini

Aplikasi ini untuk semua orang (baik itu pengusaha perorangan atau organisasi kecil) yang ingin segera memulai bisnis game online mereka sendiri, tetapi tidak punya waktu dan / atau dana yang cukup untuk mengembangkan solusi yang dibuat khusus atau membeli paket perangkat lunak kasino mahal dari yang lain vendor.

Mengapa ini tawaran yang bagus

  • Solusi kasino label putih lengkap dengan harga terjangkau
  • Didukung oleh kerangka PHP Laravel yang paling kuat dan aman
  • Pembaruan seumur hidup
  • Dukungan profesional

Game yang didukung

Game slot buah termasuk dalam paket ini.
  • Beberapa mesin slot
  • Kata
  • Roulette Eropa
  • Roulette Amerika
  • Lucky Wheel / Roda Keberuntungan
  • Bakarat
  • Selikuran
  • Video Poker
  • Keno
  • 75 Ball Bingo Amerika
  • Undian (Lotere)

https://preview.redd.it/cbe8qxyrxgk41.jpg?width=1342&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ed452e20180d6e77034081bb33c861ba659df7e7

Casino Demo Script:

Video Poker:

https://preview.redd.it/4rjvlwlwxgk41.jpg?width=1371&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7c5a40cb1fd2863aa414644f192bc12a6f39a411

Game Blackjack:

https://preview.redd.it/44a5ojkyxgk41.png?width=1370&format=png&auto=webp&s=8bf1fc7115e1dfc0f9c5d735914b71b555357a9a

Roda beruntung:

https://preview.redd.it/0p838qr2ygk41.jpg?width=1400&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6ff9e38794f20dbff2d5daeb0799e99d91812e9e

Baccarat Game:

https://preview.redd.it/o3sfvb48ygk41.jpg?width=1329&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4710c1258d559905355dbaf5d699578aa1bb18e9

Game Dadu:

https://preview.redd.it/z10hodobygk41.jpg?width=1379&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=088bc49b1ceb6787aee74f63597e73c22cf2696a

Game Lotere:

https://preview.redd.it/6rl1oi5gygk41.jpg?width=1382&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a5c8b8f86e28e66eb9c5dbc785f38190f4bf4638

Game Keno:

https://preview.redd.it/4b0ipbfsygk41.jpg?width=1379&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=600e8e6a62fc47fd87f123d324cdce1e7fd73dce

Game Multi Slots:


https://preview.redd.it/zljuf3awygk41.jpg?width=1360&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7c5cb8716610ec418cdf591451477ab3fd24bdbd

Fitur aplikasi umum

  • label putih
  • 6 skema warna bawaan
  • Teknologi yang terbukti adil
  • Bonus dan program rujukan
  • Bot
  • Obrolan
  • Papan peringkat pemain
  • Sejarah permainan yang dimainkan
  • Halaman profil pengguna dengan statistik tambahan
  • 22 bahasa bawaan (bahasa lain juga bisa ditambahkan)
  • Integrasi Google Tag Manager (GTM)
  • Google reCaptcha validasi
  • Login sosial (Facebook, Twitter, Google, LinkedIn, Yahoo, Coinbase, Steem)
  • Otentikasi dua faktor (melalui aplikasi Google Authenticator)
  • Verifikasi email pengguna
  • Aplikasi penginstal internal (plus instalasi add-on 1-klik)

https://preview.redd.it/joziu2p1zgk41.jpg?width=433&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b350dd17f914dadcf7d0704e7bed5d61f135c9ac

Fitur panel admin

  • Dasbor canggih dengan data analitik, statistik, dan grafik
  • Manajemen pengguna (melihat, memblokir, mengedit, menghapus, mengirim email terpisah)
  • Lihat akun dan transaksi akun (dengan opsi untuk mendebit / mengkredit akun pengguna secara manual)
  • Lihat riwayat game
  • Kelola pengaturan aplikasi
  • Pemeliharaan (aktifkan / nonaktifkan mode pemeliharaan, hapus cache, jalankan pembaruan basis data, jalankan tugas yang dijadwalkan)

Fitur Mesin Slot

PEMBAYARAN

20 paylines didukung. Pengguna dapat memilih berapa banyak paylines untuk bertaruh di setiap putaran (1 hingga 20).

LIAR DAN PENCUCIAN

Simbol liar menggantikan simbol biasa (kecuali pencar). Simbol Scatter menang ketika mereka muncul di gulungan di tempat mana pun. Mereka juga menawarkan pembayaran yang lebih besar dan melipatgandakan taruhan total Anda.

TARUHAN KUSTOM

Pengguna dapat memilih berapa banyak untuk bertaruh per baris.

MODE OTOMATIS

Pengguna dapat mengatur slot untuk memutar gulungan berulang-ulang sampai kondisi berhenti terpenuhi.

RAMAH MUNGKIN

Saat Anda membuka halaman game server menghasilkan rahasia dan seed dan mengungkapkan hash-nya (menggunakan algoritma HMAC SHA256). Rahasia server mewakili posisi gulungan awal. Seed server adalah string alpha-numeric acak yang aman secara kriptografis. Hash dari 2 string ini membantu memastikan bahwa posisi gulungan awal tidak diubah setelah Anda memilih jumlah garis dan jumlah taruhan. Setelah permainan selesai, rahasia server dan server seed terungkap, sehingga Anda dapat dengan mudah menghitung dan memverifikasi hash.
Ketika Anda memainkan game, Anda dapat memberikan string khusus tambahan — seed klien (jika tidak ditentukan nomor acak secara otomatis dihasilkan oleh browser Anda). Server kemudian akan menghitung hash lain menggunakan rahasia server, seed server dan seed klien. 5 karakter terakhir dari hash ini (mewakili nilai heksadesimal) akan dikonversi ke integer. Setiap digit dalam angka ini akan menghasilkan jumlah tambahan putaran pada reel yang sesuai (dari kiri ke kanan). Karena seed klien tidak dapat diprediksi oleh server, jumlah putaran tambahan benar-benar acak dan karenanya Anda dapat yakin bahwa hasil permainannya adil.
Untuk memeriksa apakah game yang Anda mainkan adil masuk ke halaman History >> My games, pilih game dan klik tombol Verifikasi.

KUSTOMISASI MUDAH

Administrator kasino dapat:
  • Kustomisasi simbol slot (unggah gambar simbol apa pun alih-alih buah tua yang baik)
  • Kustomisasi masing-masing dari 5 gulungan (simbol kehadiran dan posisinya)
  • Pilih simbol liar dan hamburkan
  • Tetapkan pembayaran untuk setiap simbol (untuk setiap jumlah kejadian)
  • Tetapkan jumlah taruhan minimum dan maksimum per baris
  • Tentukan dengan berapa banyak taruhan harus ditambahkan / dikurangi
  • Tetapkan jumlah taruhan default per baris
  • Tetapkan jumlah garis default untuk bertaruh
Dengan kemampuan di atas Anda dapat membuat mesin slot yang unik!

Bot

Untuk menarik pelanggan baru ke kasino Anda, penting untuk memiliki basis pengguna yang sudah ada, yang bermain game secara teratur dan dengan demikian meningkatkan kredibilitas situs web Anda. Belum punya pelanggan? Bot datang untuk menyelamatkan!
Administrator kasino dapat dengan mudah menghasilkan sejumlah bot di backend. Bot ini muncul sebagai pengguna biasa, tetapi secara teratur (mis. Setiap 5 menit) beberapa bot akan “bangun” dan bermain game dengan parameter acak.

Bonus

PROGRAM REFERRAL

Setiap pengguna dapat memperoleh kredit bonus untuk merujuk pengguna lain ke kasino. Administrator kasino dapat mengonfigurasi jumlah kredit bonus untuk acara-acara berikut:
  • Mendaftar (baik wasit dan pengarah akan menerima jumlah tetap dari bonus bonus)
  • Kehilangan permainan (pengarah akan menerima% dari kerugian bersih)
  • Permainan menang (pengarah akan menerima% dari kemenangan bersih)
  • Setoran (pengarah akan menerima% dari jumlah setoran) — membutuhkan tambahan Pembayaran
Pengaturan seluruh situs dapat diganti pada tingkat pengguna.

BONUS LAINNYA

  • Bonus pendaftaran pengguna reguler
  • Bonus uang kembali kehilangan game
  • Game memenangkan bonus uang kembali
  • Deposit bonus uang kembali

Persyaratan sistem

  • PHP 7.1.3 atau lebih tinggi
  • Ekstensi PHP: cURL, Mbstring, OpenSSL, PDO, Tokenizer, XML, Ctype, JSON, BCMath
  • Fungsi PHP set_time_limit () diaktifkan
  • Database MySQL
  • Penulisan ulang URL diaktifkan
  • Aplikasi harus diinstal ke folder root web dari suatu domain atau sub domain (itu tidak akan berfungsi jika diinstal ke sub folder).
Aplikasi ini dapat diinstal pada server bersama, namun pastikan Anda memiliki sumber daya sistem yang cukup dengan akun hosting Anda dan mendukung pembuatan symlink (tautan simbolik).

Log Pembaruan — Jan 2020

- Perfect Money Gateway Added. - Gateway Pembayaran Bitcoin Ditambahkan. - Gateway Pembayaran Kartu Master Ditambahkan. - Pembayaran Multi

https://preview.redd.it/8x92mk19zgk41.png?width=906&format=png&auto=webp&s=51dc88bcbb91f7057abd58172e74737295b792e7

1 domain lisensi & Instal Unduhan

Beli Script Casino:

Script Casino, Platform Mesin Game Online Slot
submitted by Champion01 to u/Champion01 [link] [comments]

HELP WANTED: CypherPoker.JS needs a team!

Please allow me to introduce myself.
My name is Patrick Bay and over the past few years I've been working on an open-source project called CypherPoker.JS
It's a decentralized, soon to be anonymous, truly peer-to-peer Texas Hold'em platform that incorporates blockchain technologies and a unique cryptosystem named SRA (based on a MIT research paper from the late 70s), which remove the need for trusted third parties and the things that go along with them: rakes / high fees, censorship susceptibility, etc.
To the best of my knowledge, to date there's nothing out there like this.
The ".JS" part means that the software is written in JavaScript for the modern browser, Node.js, and Electron. Basically, it runs on almost any device or operating system and yes, there's a web demo you can try right now (or download the desktop version if you prefer).

A Short History

After building the core game engine and a basic but extensible UI I incorporated Bitcoin, pumped up the software's peer-to-peer capabilities, and most recently added support for Bitcoin Cash. Because creating a team was the plan from the get-go I spent plenty of time documenting everything along the way.
There's plenty more in store for CypherPoker.JS but it's at a point now where I'm not sure I can continue to do it all on my own in a reasonable amount of time.
So I'm reaching out to YOU, that person who thinks that this is a pretty kick-ass concept-turned-prototype that they'd like to be associated with. It has the potential to transform the online gaming industry, not just poker. Yes, this is that early stage project you've been waiting to join.

"I'm in! What can I do?"

Now, I get that not everyone's a coder or designer and there are many shoes that need to be filled if this project is going to continue to grow at a healthy rate. Here are some suggestions:

Most social networks have a way to bring posts to prominence. These may include sharing, re-posting / cross-posting, liking, upvoting, plussing, starring. or otherwise showing approval or providing additional exposure. There's a good chance that you can do that you can do one of these things right now and that it's probably really easy.
Also watch for new releases, updates, and upcoming stuff. Share whatever you think is interesting.

Modern (ECMAScript 2017) JavaScript, HTML5 / CSS3, browser, Node.js, Electron. Make GitHub pull requests with any important / useful / cool things. Some suggestions.

Give it a try! Make a free test account (no sign-up required), get some free testnet Bitcoin or Bitcoin Cash and make a deposit (instructions on the site). Once the deposit is confirmed you can transfer it to other accounts, including new ones that you create. Be aware of this outstanding issue if you want to use Bitcoin or Bitcoin Cash proper.
If you find problems, feel free to post them on the subreddit (or DM), tweet about them, or post them directly to the GitHub issues system where they should eventually end up anyway (you can use a free account). I also [do email](mailto:[email protected]).

Spread the gospel of peer-to-peer poker.
Get to know its deeper inner truths.
Play it, praise it, grow the flock!

Those would help a lot, actually. My laptop's been acting up and I'll probably need a new one soon. I also don't have regular internet access; makes working on this project challenging.
Bitcoin: 18yWpM7CnYox58YMJ2iVa1aJZCs1sufPhg
Bitcoin Cash: bitcoincash:qrgzc6nf6275er7k04tjwauf4ptm9mw9qcaq6fceup

If you have some web server space or Node.js / PHP+MySQL hosting please consider hosting a node. Limits have been built into the software (e.g. max database size), so you don't have to worry about it unnecessarily eating up resources. DM or [email](mailto:[email protected]) me for details.

Tournament funding and advertising are two immediate ideas that spring to mind but if you have any other sponsorship ideas I'd be happy to discuss them. Please contact me via DM or [email](mailto:[email protected]).

Quid Pro Quo

Perhaps you need a hand with one of your projects? Maybe you'd like a few guest blog posts? Possibly there's some other reciprocal arrangement you'd like to propose?
Contact me via DM or [email](mailto:[email protected]) to hash out the details.
submitted by monican_agent to freesoftware [link] [comments]

HELP WANTED: CypherPoker.JS needs a team!

Please allow me to introduce myself.
My name is Patrick Bay and over the past few years I've been working on an open-source project called CypherPoker.JS
It's a decentralized, soon to be anonymous, truly peer-to-peer Texas Hold'em platform that incorporates blockchain technologies and a unique cryptosystem named SRA (based on a MIT research paper from the late 70s), which remove the need for trusted third parties and the things that go along with them: rakes / high fees, censorship susceptibility, etc.
To the best of my knowledge, to date there's nothing out there like this.
The ".JS" part means that the software is written in JavaScript for the modern browser, Node.js, and Electron. Basically, it runs on almost any device or operating system and yes, there's a web demo you can try right now (or download the desktop version if you prefer).

A Short History

After building the core game engine and a basic but extensible UI I incorporated Bitcoin, pumped up the software's peer-to-peer capabilities, and most recently added support for Bitcoin Cash. Because creating a team was the plan from the get-go I spent plenty of time documenting everything along the way.
There's plenty more in store for CypherPoker.JS but it's at a point now where I'm not sure I can continue to do it all on my own in a reasonable amount of time.
So I'm reaching out to YOU, that person who thinks that this is a pretty kick-ass concept-turned-prototype that they'd like to be associated with. It has the potential to transform the online gaming industry, not just poker. Yes, this is that early stage project you've been waiting to join.

"I'm in! What can I do?"

Now, I get that not everyone's a coder or designer and there are many shoes that need to be filled if this project is going to continue to grow at a healthy rate. Here are some suggestions:

Most social networks have a way to bring posts to prominence. I'll leave the details up to you.
Also watch for new releases, updates, and upcoming stuff and share whatever you think is interesting.

Modern (ECMAScript 2017) JavaScript, HTML5 / CSS3, browser, Node.js, Electron. Make GitHub pull requests with any important / useful / cool things. Some suggestions.

Give it a try! Make a free test account (no sign-up required), get some free testnet Bitcoin or Bitcoin Cash and make a deposit (instructions on the site). Once the deposit is confirmed you can transfer it to other accounts, including new ones that you create. Be aware of this outstanding issue if you want to use Bitcoin or Bitcoin Cash proper.
If you find problems, feel free to post them on the subreddit (or DM), tweet about them, or post them directly to the GitHub issues system where they should eventually end up anyway (you can use a free account). I also [do email](mailto:[email protected]).

Spread the gospel of peer-to-peer poker.
Get to know its deeper inner truths.
Play it, praise it, grow the flock!

Those would help a lot, actually. My laptop's been acting up and I'll probably need a new one soon. I also don't have regular internet access; makes working on this project challenging.
DM me for details (I'm tying to abide by the community rules).

If you have some web server space or Node.js / PHP+MySQL hosting please consider hosting a node. Limits have been built into the software (e.g. max database size), so you don't have to worry about it unnecessarily eating up resources. DM or [email](mailto:[email protected]) me for details.

Tournament funding and advertising are two immediate ideas that spring to mind but if you have any other sponsorship ideas I'd be happy to discuss them. Please contact me via DM or [email](mailto:[email protected]).

Quid Pro Quo

Perhaps you need a hand with one of your projects? Maybe you'd like a few guest blog posts? Possibly there's some other reciprocal arrangement you'd like to propose?
Contact me via DM or [email](mailto:[email protected]) to hash out the details.
submitted by monican_agent to btc [link] [comments]

Rise and Fall Part 9.

Part 8 (has link to all before it, part 7 link has each individual link)
I expect this one to be the least popular one. Just wanted to be a cynic to open it up. I have been busy and this ones prob a bit sloppy, I didnt really proof read it or clean it up. The next one will likely be my last and hopefully the best one.
It is early 2017. I have been carrying on my usual playing 10-20 hours a week to survive. Still lethargic is best term I suppose. I just dont get excited to play anymore. I consider getting a job to remind me how shitty working is so it gives me a kick in the teeth to play poker. Then it dawns on me, I hate playing poker now.
Poker has been tainted. Everything bad that happened to me I can associate with poker. The rise and fall was poker (the fall part). The oxycontin started as a performance enhancer to log more hours. Everything I consider to be wrong in my life I trace back to poker essentially, even if just a butterfly affect reason that had I done something else I wouldnt be here.
Hating poker is not the greatest realization considering its my only means to income outside of grunt labor. I seek a job in a couple places to no avail which was fine, I didnt wanna do that either.
Several months earlier I had started playing on SWC (bitcoin site) and became familiarized with bitcoin. Thought nothing of it, it was just the currency I was winning or losing. I dont read a thing about it, I learn nothing of it. I wasnt playing a ton or even big stakes, my intention for playing online was to just stay sharp in case it ever comes back full fledge. I have 5-6 btc on this site at the most (2-3k) and I flush it playing plo and big o not thinking much of it.
Back to 2017. Its March/April~ of 2017. I am playing cards one night dicking around probably had a couple drinks and was needling the usuals etc. A guy I do not know is in the game. Looks Russian. I bet he interfered in our election... fucking commies. I dont remember how I got to talking to him but crypto had been brought up. I talk about SWC. Tell him I had a few btc but not anymore. The only other thing I remember well from the conversation was bitching about going from an iphone4 (yes I had an iphone4 from 2010-17, the same one. It barely worked. Many oxycontins snorted off the back of that phone, texts dating back to when I got it in 2010) to the 6 or 7 or wtfever I have now, which is bigger and its harder to text and drive. He just responds by saying “first world problems are the worst”. Amen brother, those Africans and Venezuelans have no clue of our struggle.
I end up talking to him a bit and it turns out he mines crypto. Has a website that sells mining equipment. He has a hell of a back story too. I tell him I am interested in mining. I have about 20k to my name at this time and I realized recently that I dont like playing poker so why not? He eventually tells me not to do it. Regardless we become friends and he is ultimately the most important friend I have ever made. I have made more positive strides mentally since meeting him (mostly work ethic, realizations, reality checks and aspirations) As silly as it sounds, when he told me “first world problems are the worst” it stuck with me. He was saying it as a joke but jokes are funniest when true. He is genuinely the smartest guy I have ever associated with also. If you run into him at a poker table youd think he was a high functioning autist. Then you talk to him and go “ohhh hes just one of those Einstein type geniuses”. His hair is usually a mess, he cuts his own hair for or has his girlfriend do it. He wears cheap clothing usually since it all covers your ass or nipples I suppose. He virtually never instigates conversation with people he doesnt know. He is really deliberate with his actions. Talks really calmly and knows exactly what he is saying. He is just on the same level at all times it seems.
Meeting him has definitely changed my life for the better. We become friends pretty quickly. I know I went on a downer after meeting him because I couldnt afford to buy mining stuff and remember wanting to (again, he told me not to do it eventually anyways).
Which will lead me to another good friend to have. Between 2015 and this point in 2017 I have shot myself in the foot not logging hours a couple times. A friend has bailed me out with a loan or short term stake a few times. He is a well off restaurant owner who loves poker more than just about anything not related to him. Every time I see him we talk about hands he played and he just eats it up, has photographic memory and never butchers a hand history which is nice. He is as good hearted of a guy as I have ever met. (Sorry if this is getting long winded giving praise to people close to me, I intend on sharing with a few people and would like them to know what they mean to me as corny as that is because I suck at doing it in real life. Plus it is kinda gay to get mushy sounding in real life, but I digress. Theyve heard virtually none of the content of this whole thread either, a ton of this stuff I have never shared) In fact he is too kind hearted. He has helped people who wouldnt piss on him if he was on fire, and people have burned him on many occasions. My only complaint about this person is he never kicked my ass and told me to log more hours or fuck off. I needed it. If I just logged hours I wouldnt need the help. Its as simple as that. I have no leaks other than the unwillingness to play (leaks as in drugs/pit games/strippers/wtf ever else) and it has hindered me immensely over the these last couple years. (Ok I do have one embarrassing leak that has been fixed for a year and change, mobile games... I have spent like 30,000$ on mobile games between late 2016 and late 2018, Lords Mobile specifically clocked me for 20k. This definitely hindered my ability to build a roll and got me into a few jams. When youre not logging hours playing youre sitting around gaming and these games arent cheap obviously)
It is around May now and my friend who messes with crypto tells me that Bitcoin is going to 10,000$. Its like 800$ at the time iirc. I own a couple from Ignition cashouts. I kind of trust him. I cant argue him on it as I have literally no mental fortitude on the subject, but I essentially shrug it off. I start watching the price on poloniex and am watching prices jump like crazy. Light bulb in head! I can buy the dips sell the peaks and have more BTC! Lets load the 2.5btc I have onto poloniex! Sell peak but it keeps climbing... “FUCK! gotta get it back before it goes to 10k! Whew. Still have 2.45 BTC. FUCK! Its dropping! Get it out before it goes to zero!”
Yea I turned that 2.5 BTC into .4 BTC. No joke. I think I ended up throwing it onto SWC and losing it once it was almost gone. I honestly forget. I had nothing when it finally hit 20k other than some shit alts worth about 800$ at most (worth 35$ now but they still reside in my locked poloniex account, maybe I will give poloniex my ID if they ever become worth more than 1k)
So I am now annoyed I didnt turn every free dollar I had into BTC. I didnt trust the guy enough and to be fair I would have been using the money I play with. Had I met the guy a year earlier (know what I know of him now) I would probably have just locked it all up and sat around waiting.
I never really get my act together in 2017. I continuously log just enough hours to get by. I just dont care. I just want a way out of this. I catch myself saying “I hate playing poker” and sometime around the end of 17 or early 2018 I start trying to censor myself and quit saying that. Saying it will only make it fester deeper. I have to retrain myself to love poker. I remember the days of playing 18-24 hours straight because I love playing. I love watching for everything I can find to get an edge. I love a situation to present itself where I can step out of line. But now I just sit down and count the minutes before I can tell myself “way to go! You put in an 8 hour shift lets pack it in!” I leave good games often times. I celebrate when games break. This is where I am mentally while I play. I cant break out of it.
Late in 2017 a close friend of mine passes away. Will call him J. He was the guy who gave me a place to stay after the shutdown in Joplin. I was still doing oxy and he never once touched the stuff knowing what has happened to me. He doesnt judge me, he is somewhat of an enabler I suppose. He just drinks does shitty coke sometimes and has a script of adderol and xanax. Literally never once does he do any with me (ive warned him xanax and opiates will kill you if you mix, which is likely part of the reason he never did it) He was a marginal poker player (relative to modern game, he was just good enough to beat the rake live but he had too many pit leaks) and took great pride in being my friend (I was the slayer in the area for years leading up to this, anyone considered the best in their area can relate, you just have the respect of the local poker community). One of my earlier live poker memories involved him. I am like 18 or 19 playing a 1-2 game at a small casino and he was there with a friend. They were the good players in the game at the time. They were having a few drinks eating nice food and laughing having a good time. I remember thinking that I want this lifestyle. Care free gambling fast paced lifestyle. I had told him this story years later and he just ate it up, constantly tried to get me to rebound, but as I have stated many many times in the last few of these I have basically waved my white flag and accepted the result of my fall.
Anyhow after living with him we always talk every few months at minimal and have something to eat when we see each other at the casino. He was somewhat disingenuous sounding he was so nice and honestly it got to a point it started rubbing me the wrong way. I still talk to him of course but less frequently. In December of 2017 I get a phone call from my friend who owns the restaurant and he is distraught. He has been at the hospital and J has passed away. The back story on this is he had gotten a phone call from old friend who was getting out of prison in Arizona with no where to go (a female). J being as nice a guy as he is drives the 20+ hours to get her and gives her a place to stay. Well shes a junky and actually convinces J to do opiates/heroin. He overdoses and dies. I hadnt talked to him in a few months. I regret it. Had I known I would have beaten him senseless and got him to quit before things actually get bad.
Going to his funeral hit me up side the head too. The way I started feeling he was disingenuous just got destroyed. I cant fathom as many people showing up to my funeral with as nice of things to say. I wrote something to say but opt out after a few people say everything I had written (except better). I regret not saying them anyways. I think I still have what I wrote tucked away with the card and his money clip that made its way to me. I stumbled across his casino players card in a box one day and it resides in my wallet ever since. This was the first close friend that has passed away in my life, knock on wood. It woke me up a bit and caused a lot of self reflection because I felt I had let him down. I lived a few miles from him and didnt drop in to see him, didnt stay in contact as well as I should have. All because I felt he was disingenuously nice when he was actually just nice, which is actually because I am a cynical hermit who hates social life these days. That was the real reason I didnt stay closer. Him being too nice was just my excuse to blow him off essentially.
Only other thing I can add is that chick he helped out didnt even go to his funeral and on top of that had tried to take his truck and clean his house out. Junkies are the worst. I was a junky but I proudly say I never robbed anyone or cost anyone anything other than emotional distress.
2018 starts and I have been decreasing my methadone every week for about 3-4 months now. I am on a low dose. Makes sleeping at night hard (get restless legs and sneezy). So I am having a few drinks any time I am at the casino playing (still just two days a week for the most part) to help get through those late night sessions when its worn off and I feel crummy. I get down to 15mg then 10mg and in March of 2018 I get asked if I wanna work for a week with my crypto friend. His friend is setting up a farm with 500 miners and needs help. I agree. The pay is in excess of the work (in my opinion) at 3k and I have no expenses, but I dont argue obviously. Before we leave town I have to pick up my week of methadone (at 4mg now) and so I do that. I never take any of them, I have the box still. Never opened it. They remain at my apartment as a reminder, the box carrying the 6 doses and a stack of receipts for every 75$ week that I kept in the box, several years worth, at least 9-10k worth of receipts, and that shits CHEAP compared to oxy. So I am finally off of opiates. I take kratom still but its essentially non addictive in comparison. Ill cede that I am reliant on kratom but if it disappeared tomorrow I wouldnt panic, I would be fine.
So I fly to Denver with my friend and meet his friends half brother who was instructed to rent a box truck and the three of us were to drive from Denver to Washington carrying like half a million dollars worth of hardware. Its early March, the roads arent exactly great. Half brother of his friend rents a truck with no middle seat though. Its absolutely miserable. Whoever sat middle was sitting like a fem boy legs closed and knees up high from the drive shaft hump. It was un fucking real how uncomfortable the middle was. So like I stated the roads were not great, we drove on ice for 5-6 hours straight (while my crypto friend did about 30 minutes of it before I decided I value my life and banned him from driving, he was literally doing over 70 on this ice sheet when I checked the gauge. I forget what he said, I will fail to make it sound as good but he said that he is protected and can not die, if we wreck he wont get hurt because of some universe stipulation that protects him. He said we would get hurt but he wouldnt. (I will have him tell me this stuff again and leave it in comments, it was pretty funny and I kinda want to think he believes what he said as it was clearly not something he just came up with).
I end up driving like 18 of the 24 (one shot) hours it took as letting crypto friend drive was out. We make it set up a farm over a couple days then we go to Vegas. Not only do we go to Vegas but we fly a private jet. Not only do we take a private jet but his buddy has all four of us our own room at the Bellagio for 5-6 days. I remember having a 4500$ win at Bellagios 500$ cap 2-5 game... ran pretty salty. I only remember one hand worth bringing up, but I closed action and called 400$ pre with 67o with 3 others all in. Just flop 77X and send me the money. (Was drinking, gamble gamble). I cold called that also, some fish had opened massive and a 300$ stack just ripped a 400$ stack rejammed and I had called out of bb knowing fish will call off his 400~. This is actually a leak I have in poker. I will go over it because it has history.
Dating back to online my biggest leak was playing vs short stacks. Everyones biggest leak obv (6m setting). There were a few min buyers on Carbon and I got to the point I put them in pre every time they opened my bb from button, so long as they opened 75%+ from button or close to it. This has carried with me live, if I can gamble 3-4 ways (4 specifically) I will basically do it any time its 100bb~ or less with about 40% of hands if I can close action safely. I am a bit of a degenerate in this sense. I will flip for 1k if I have 10k to my name. It mostly came as a way to loosen up tables (the flipping blind preflop) at my local casino with players who give action. I am pretty snug in general but I cant refuse a flip when it presents itself and I cant refuse a fun gamble with short stacks.
I spend the month in Vegas during WSOP and run absurdly bad. Lose every big pot I play it seems. Switch to PLO the last half of the month and go a week straight without tripling my buy in up at any point. Just insane. Looking back I play rather poorly in PLO. I have been spoiled with my PLO games back home (which have been dead for about a year) and could get away with playing 50% of hands and no one ever bet big draws or anything not the nuts basically. I didnt adjust at all is what the issue was. Was just a frustrating month.
So I return and take a stake from a friend. I barely play still. Same ole same ole.
The last thing I will cover for this section is an incident late in 2018. One of the girls who is the floor at my local casino takes kratom also, we talk about it a fair amount. She has some 10mg percocets (mini oxycontins essentially) she gives me two of them. I havent had one in several years. I have been off methadone for 6-8 months at the time. I am eager to feel what I felt all those years ago, having no tolerance. So I take them home even though I know I shouldnt.
I get home and take both of them. What transpires is almost depressing. It frustrates me to no end that I realized that I have no desire for these. It affirms that all the money I flushed wasnt about the high, it was about the not withdrawing. I basically stated this in an earlier post but this is the event that I learned this from. I dont even enjoy it. I just sink knowing that I gave my life away for these. I have never recovered thanks to pain killers. Never once after 2011 have I ever looked in the mirror and said “finally, I have finally recovered what I fucked off”.
I am going to finish this thread off on the next post most likely. It will likely be long and take me a while to compose as it will cover my current year, and put a bow on it. The story basically climaxes a couple posts back, these surely have slowly lost their luster but I will finish them anyways. Nothing exciting about hearing about a guy who can beat games but wont sit in the chair to do it. Its a bit more upbeat in 2019 though and I feel my future is bright and redemption nears though. I dont think I would have written these if not for a change of mentality recently, so look forward to a positive summary next post.
submitted by cisheteropatriarchy to poker [link] [comments]

HELP WANTED: CypherPoker.JS needs a team!

Please allow me to introduce myself.
My name is Patrick Bay and over the past few years I've been working on an open-source project called CypherPoker.JS
It's a decentralized, soon to be anonymous, truly peer-to-peer Texas Hold'em platform that incorporates blockchain technologies and a unique cryptosystem named SRA (based on a MIT research paper from the late 70s), which remove the need for trusted third parties and the things that go along with them: rakes / high fees, censorship susceptibility, etc.
To the best of my knowledge, to date there's nothing out there like this.
The ".JS" part means that the software is written in JavaScript for the modern browser, Node.js, and Electron. Basically, it runs on almost any device or operating system and yes, there's a web demo you can try right now (or download the desktop version if you prefer).

A Short History

After building the core game engine and a basic but extensible UI I incorporated Bitcoin, pumped up the software's peer-to-peer capabilities, and most recently added support for Bitcoin Cash. Because creating a team was the plan from the get-go I spent plenty of time documenting everything along the way.
There's plenty more in store for CypherPoker.JS but it's at a point now where I'm not sure I can continue to do it all on my own in a reasonable amount of time.
So I'm reaching out to YOU, that person who thinks that this is a pretty kick-ass concept-turned-prototype that they'd like to be associated with. It has the potential to transform the online gaming industry, not just poker. Yes, this is that early stage project you've been waiting to join.

"I'm in! What can I do?"

Now, I get that not everyone's a coder or designer and there are many shoes that need to be filled if this project is going to continue to grow at a healthy rate. Here are some suggestions:

Most social networks have a way to bring posts to prominence. These may include sharing, re-posting / cross-posting, liking, upvoting, plussing, starring. or otherwise showing approval or providing additional exposure. There's a good chance that you can do that you can do one of these things right now and that it's probably really easy.
Also watch for new releases, updates, and upcoming stuff. Share whatever you think is interesting.

Modern (ECMAScript 2017) JavaScript, HTML5 / CSS3, browser, Node.js, Electron. Make GitHub pull requests with any important / useful / cool things. Some suggestions.

Give it a try! Make a free test account (no sign-up required), get some free testnet Bitcoin or Bitcoin Cash and make a deposit (instructions on the site). Once the deposit is confirmed you can transfer it to other accounts, including new ones that you create. Be aware of this outstanding issue if you want to use Bitcoin or Bitcoin Cash proper.
If you find problems, feel free to post them on the subreddit (or DM), tweet about them, or post them directly to the GitHub issues system where they should eventually end up anyway (you can use a free account). I also [do email](mailto:[email protected]).

Spread the gospel of peer-to-peer poker.
Get to know its deeper inner truths.
Play it, praise it, grow the flock!

Those would help a lot, actually. My laptop's been acting up and I'll probably need a new one soon. I also don't have regular internet access; makes working on this project challenging.
Bitcoin: 18yWpM7CnYox58YMJ2iVa1aJZCs1sufPhg
Bitcoin Cash: bitcoincash:qrgzc6nf6275er7k04tjwauf4ptm9mw9qcaq6fceup

If you have some web server space or Node.js / PHP+MySQL hosting please consider hosting a node. Limits have been built into the software (e.g. max database size), so you don't have to worry about it unnecessarily eating up resources. DM or [email](mailto:[email protected]) me for details.

Tournament funding and advertising are two immediate ideas that spring to mind but if you have any other sponsorship ideas I'd be happy to discuss them. Please contact me via DM or [email](mailto:[email protected]).

Quid Pro Quo

Perhaps you need a hand with one of your projects? Maybe you'd like a few guest blog posts? Possibly there's some other reciprocal arrangement you'd like to propose?
Contact me via DM or [email](mailto:[email protected]) to hash out the details.
submitted by monican_agent to opensource [link] [comments]

CypherPoker.JS needs a team!

Please allow me to introduce myself.
My name is Patrick Bay and over the past few years I've been working on an open-source project called CypherPoker.JS
It's a decentralized, soon to be anonymous, truly peer-to-peer Texas Hold'em platform that incorporates blockchain technologies and a unique cryptosystem named SRA (based on a MIT research paper from the late 70s), which remove the need for trusted third parties and the things that go along with them: rakes / high fees, censorship susceptibility, etc.
To the best of my knowledge, to date there's nothing out there like this.
The ".JS" part means that the software is written in JavaScript for the modern browser, Node.js, and Electron. Basically, it runs on almost any device or operating system and yes, there's a web demo you can try right now (or download the desktop version if you prefer).

A Short History

After building the core game engine and a basic but extensible UI I incorporated Bitcoin, pumped up the software's peer-to-peer capabilities, and most recently added support for Bitcoin Cash. Because creating a team was the plan from the get-go I spent plenty of time documenting everything along the way.
There's plenty more in store for CypherPoker.JS but it's at a point now where I'm not sure I can continue to do it all on my own in a reasonable amount of time.
So I'm reaching out to YOU, that person who thinks that this is a pretty kick-ass concept-turned-prototype that they'd like to be associated with. It has the potential to transform the online gaming industry, not just poker. Yes, this is that early stage project you've been waiting to join.

"I'm in! What can I do?"

Now, I get that not everyone's a coder or designer and there are many shoes that need to be filled if this project is going to continue to grow at a healthy rate. Here are some suggestions:

Most social networks have a way to bring posts to prominence. These may include sharing, re-posting / cross-posting, liking, upvoting, plussing, starring. or otherwise showing approval or providing additional exposure. There's a good chance that you can do that you can do one of these things right now and that it's probably really easy.
Also watch for new releases, updates, and upcoming stuff. Share whatever you think is interesting.

Modern (ECMAScript 2017) JavaScript, HTML5 / CSS3, browser, Node.js, Electron. Make GitHub pull requests with any important / useful / cool things. Some suggestions.

Give it a try! Make a free test account (no sign-up required), get some free testnet Bitcoin or Bitcoin Cash and make a deposit (instructions on the site). Once the deposit is confirmed you can transfer it to other accounts, including new ones that you create. Be aware of this outstanding issue if you want to use Bitcoin or Bitcoin Cash proper.
If you find problems, feel free to post them on the subreddit (or DM), tweet about them, or post them directly to the GitHub issues system where they should eventually end up anyway (you can use a free account). I also [do email](mailto:[email protected]).

Spread the gospel of peer-to-peer poker.
Get to know its deeper inner truths.
Play it, praise it, grow the flock!

Those would help a lot, actually. My laptop's been acting up and I'll probably need a new one soon. I also don't have regular internet access; makes working on this project challenging.
Bitcoin: 18yWpM7CnYox58YMJ2iVa1aJZCs1sufPhg
Bitcoin Cash: bitcoincash:qrgzc6nf6275er7k04tjwauf4ptm9mw9qcaq6fceup

If you have some web server space or Node.js / PHP+MySQL hosting please consider hosting a node. Limits have been built into the software (e.g. max database size), so you don't have to worry about it unnecessarily eating up resources. DM or [email](mailto:[email protected]) me for details.

Tournament funding and advertising are two immediate ideas that spring to mind but if you have any other sponsorship ideas I'd be happy to discuss them. Please contact me via DM or [email](mailto:[email protected]).

Quid Pro Quo

Perhaps you need a hand with one of your projects? Maybe you'd like a few guest blog posts? Possibly there's some other reciprocal arrangement you'd like to propose?
Contact me via DM or [email](mailto:[email protected]) to hash out the details.
submitted by monican_agent to cypherpoker [link] [comments]

Rise and Fall Part 9.

Part 8 (has link to all before it, part 7 link has each individual link)
I expect this one to be the least popular one. Just wanted to be a cynic to open it up. I have been busy and this ones prob a bit sloppy, I didnt really proof read it or clean it up. The next one will likely be my last and hopefully the best one.
It is early 2017. I have been carrying on my usual playing 10-20 hours a week to survive. Still lethargic is best term I suppose. I just dont get excited to play anymore. I consider getting a job to remind me how shitty working is so it gives me a kick in the teeth to play poker. Then it dawns on me, I hate playing poker now.
Poker has been tainted. Everything bad that happened to me I can associate with poker. The rise and fall was poker (the fall part). The oxycontin started as a performance enhancer to log more hours. Everything I consider to be wrong in my life I trace back to poker essentially, even if just a butterfly affect reason that had I done something else I wouldnt be here.
Hating poker is not the greatest realization considering its my only means to income outside of grunt labor. I seek a job in a couple places to no avail which was fine, I didnt wanna do that either.
Several months earlier I had started playing on SWC (bitcoin site) and became familiarized with bitcoin. Thought nothing of it, it was just the currency I was winning or losing. I dont read a thing about it, I learn nothing of it. I wasnt playing a ton or even big stakes, my intention for playing online was to just stay sharp in case it ever comes back full fledge. I have 5-6 btc on this site at the most (2-3k) and I flush it playing plo and big o not thinking much of it.
Back to 2017. Its March/April~ of 2017. I am playing cards one night dicking around probably had a couple drinks and was needling the usuals etc. A guy I do not know is in the game. Looks Russian. I bet he interfered in our election... fucking commies. I dont remember how I got to talking to him but crypto had been brought up. I talk about SWC. Tell him I had a few btc but not anymore. The only other thing I remember well from the conversation was bitching about going from an iphone4 (yes I had an iphone4 from 2010-17, the same one. It barely worked. Many oxycontins snorted off the back of that phone, texts dating back to when I got it in 2010) to the 6 or 7 or wtfever I have now, which is bigger and its harder to text and drive. He just responds by saying “first world problems are the worst”. Amen brother, those Africans and Venezuelans have no clue of our struggle.
I end up talking to him a bit and it turns out he mines crypto. Has a website that sells mining equipment. He has a hell of a back story too. I tell him I am interested in mining. I have about 20k to my name at this time and I realized recently that I dont like playing poker so why not? He eventually tells me not to do it. Regardless we become friends and he is ultimately the most important friend I have ever made. I have made more positive strides mentally since meeting him (mostly work ethic, realizations, reality checks and aspirations) As silly as it sounds, when he told me “first world problems are the worst” it stuck with me. He was saying it as a joke but jokes are funniest when true. He is genuinely the smartest guy I have ever associated with also. If you run into him at a poker table youd think he was a high functioning autist. Then you talk to him and go “ohhh hes just one of those Einstein type geniuses”. His hair is usually a mess, he cuts his own hair for or has his girlfriend do it. He wears cheap clothing usually since it all covers your ass or nipples I suppose. He virtually never instigates conversation with people he doesnt know. He is really deliberate with his actions. Talks really calmly and knows exactly what he is saying. He is just on the same level at all times it seems.
Meeting him has definitely changed my life for the better. We become friends pretty quickly. I know I went on a downer after meeting him because I couldnt afford to buy mining stuff and remember wanting to (again, he told me not to do it eventually anyways).
Which will lead me to another good friend to have. Between 2015 and this point in 2017 I have shot myself in the foot not logging hours a couple times. A friend has bailed me out with a loan or short term stake a few times. He is a well off restaurant owner who loves poker more than just about anything not related to him. Every time I see him we talk about hands he played and he just eats it up, has photographic memory and never butchers a hand history which is nice. He is as good hearted of a guy as I have ever met. (Sorry if this is getting long winded giving praise to people close to me, I intend on sharing with a few people and would like them to know what they mean to me as corny as that is because I suck at doing it in real life. Plus it is kinda gay to get mushy sounding in real life, but I digress. Theyve heard virtually none of the content of this whole thread either, a ton of this stuff I have never shared) In fact he is too kind hearted. He has helped people who wouldnt piss on him if he was on fire, and people have burned him on many occasions. My only complaint about this person is he never kicked my ass and told me to log more hours or fuck off. I needed it. If I just logged hours I wouldnt need the help. Its as simple as that. I have no leaks other than the unwillingness to play (leaks as in drugs/pit games/strippers/wtf ever else) and it has hindered me immensely over the these last couple years. (Ok I do have one embarrassing leak that has been fixed for a year and change, mobile games... I have spent like 30,000$ on mobile games between late 2016 and late 2018, Lords Mobile specifically clocked me for 20k. This definitely hindered my ability to build a roll and got me into a few jams. When youre not logging hours playing youre sitting around gaming and these games arent cheap obviously)
It is around May now and my friend who messes with crypto tells me that Bitcoin is going to 10,000$. Its like 800$ at the time iirc. I own a couple from Ignition cashouts. I kind of trust him. I cant argue him on it as I have literally no mental fortitude on the subject, but I essentially shrug it off. I start watching the price on poloniex and am watching prices jump like crazy. Light bulb in head! I can buy the dips sell the peaks and have more BTC! Lets load the 2.5btc I have onto poloniex! Sell peak but it keeps climbing... “FUCK! gotta get it back before it goes to 10k! Whew. Still have 2.45 BTC. FUCK! Its dropping! Get it out before it goes to zero!”
Yea I turned that 2.5 BTC into .4 BTC. No joke. I think I ended up throwing it onto SWC and losing it once it was almost gone. I honestly forget. I had nothing when it finally hit 20k other than some shit alts worth about 800$ at most (worth 35$ now but they still reside in my locked poloniex account, maybe I will give poloniex my ID if they ever become worth more than 1k)
So I am now annoyed I didnt turn every free dollar I had into BTC. I didnt trust the guy enough and to be fair I would have been using the money I play with. Had I met the guy a year earlier (know what I know of him now) I would probably have just locked it all up and sat around waiting.
I never really get my act together in 2017. I continuously log just enough hours to get by. I just dont care. I just want a way out of this. I catch myself saying “I hate playing poker” and sometime around the end of 17 or early 2018 I start trying to censor myself and quit saying that. Saying it will only make it fester deeper. I have to retrain myself to love poker. I remember the days of playing 18-24 hours straight because I love playing. I love watching for everything I can find to get an edge. I love a situation to present itself where I can step out of line. But now I just sit down and count the minutes before I can tell myself “way to go! You put in an 8 hour shift lets pack it in!” I leave good games often times. I celebrate when games break. This is where I am mentally while I play. I cant break out of it.
Late in 2017 a close friend of mine passes away. Will call him J. He was the guy who gave me a place to stay after the shutdown in Joplin. I was still doing oxy and he never once touched the stuff knowing what has happened to me. He doesnt judge me, he is somewhat of an enabler I suppose. He just drinks does shitty coke sometimes and has a script of adderol and xanax. Literally never once does he do any with me (ive warned him xanax and opiates will kill you if you mix, which is likely part of the reason he never did it) He was a marginal poker player (relative to modern game, he was just good enough to beat the rake live but he had too many pit leaks) and took great pride in being my friend (I was the slayer in the area for years leading up to this, anyone considered the best in their area can relate, you just have the respect of the local poker community). One of my earlier live poker memories involved him. I am like 18 or 19 playing a 1-2 game at a small casino and he was there with a friend. They were the good players in the game at the time. They were having a few drinks eating nice food and laughing having a good time. I remember thinking that I want this lifestyle. Care free gambling fast paced lifestyle. I had told him this story years later and he just ate it up, constantly tried to get me to rebound, but as I have stated many many times in the last few of these I have basically waved my white flag and accepted the result of my fall.
Anyhow after living with him we always talk every few months at minimal and have something to eat when we see each other at the casino. He was somewhat disingenuous sounding he was so nice and honestly it got to a point it started rubbing me the wrong way. I still talk to him of course but less frequently. In December of 2017 I get a phone call from my friend who owns the restaurant and he is distraught. He has been at the hospital and J has passed away. The back story on this is he had gotten a phone call from old friend who was getting out of prison in Arizona with no where to go (a female). J being as nice a guy as he is drives the 20+ hours to get her and gives her a place to stay. Well shes a junky and actually convinces J to do opiates/heroin. He overdoses and dies. I hadnt talked to him in a few months. I regret it. Had I known I would have beaten him senseless and got him to quit before things actually get bad.
Going to his funeral hit me up side the head too. The way I started feeling he was disingenuous just got destroyed. I cant fathom as many people showing up to my funeral with as nice of things to say. I wrote something to say but opt out after a few people say everything I had written (except better). I regret not saying them anyways. I think I still have what I wrote tucked away with the card and his money clip that made its way to me. I stumbled across his casino players card in a box one day and it resides in my wallet ever since. This was the first close friend that has passed away in my life, knock on wood. It woke me up a bit and caused a lot of self reflection because I felt I had let him down. I lived a few miles from him and didnt drop in to see him, didnt stay in contact as well as I should have. All because I felt he was disingenuously nice when he was actually just nice, which is actually because I am a cynical hermit who hates social life these days. That was the real reason I didnt stay closer. Him being too nice was just my excuse to blow him off essentially.
Only other thing I can add is that chick he helped out didnt even go to his funeral and on top of that had tried to take his truck and clean his house out. Junkies are the worst. I was a junky but I proudly say I never robbed anyone or cost anyone anything other than emotional distress.
2018 starts and I have been decreasing my methadone every week for about 3-4 months now. I am on a low dose. Makes sleeping at night hard (get restless legs and sneezy). So I am having a few drinks any time I am at the casino playing (still just two days a week for the most part) to help get through those late night sessions when its worn off and I feel crummy. I get down to 15mg then 10mg and in March of 2018 I get asked if I wanna work for a week with my crypto friend. His friend is setting up a farm with 500 miners and needs help. I agree. The pay is in excess of the work (in my opinion) at 3k and I have no expenses, but I dont argue obviously. Before we leave town I have to pick up my week of methadone (at 4mg now) and so I do that. I never take any of them, I have the box still. Never opened it. They remain at my apartment as a reminder, the box carrying the 6 doses and a stack of receipts for every 75$ week that I kept in the box, several years worth, at least 9-10k worth of receipts, and that shits CHEAP compared to oxy. So I am finally off of opiates. I take kratom still but its essentially non addictive in comparison. Ill cede that I am reliant on kratom but if it disappeared tomorrow I wouldnt panic, I would be fine.
So I fly to Denver with my friend and meet his friends half brother who was instructed to rent a box truck and the three of us were to drive from Denver to Washington carrying like half a million dollars worth of hardware. Its early March, the roads arent exactly great. Half brother of his friend rents a truck with no middle seat though. Its absolutely miserable. Whoever sat middle was sitting like a fem boy legs closed and knees up high from the drive shaft hump. It was un fucking real how uncomfortable the middle was. So like I stated the roads were not great, we drove on ice for 5-6 hours straight (while my crypto friend did about 30 minutes of it before I decided I value my life and banned him from driving, he was literally doing over 70 on this ice sheet when I checked the gauge. I forget what he said, I will fail to make it sound as good but he said that he is protected and can not die, if we wreck he wont get hurt because of some universe stipulation that protects him. He said we would get hurt but he wouldnt. (I will have him tell me this stuff again and leave it in comments, it was pretty funny and I kinda want to think he believes what he said as it was clearly not something he just came up with).
I end up driving like 18 of the 24 (one shot) hours it took as letting crypto friend drive was out. We make it set up a farm over a couple days then we go to Vegas. Not only do we go to Vegas but we fly a private jet. Not only do we take a private jet but his buddy has all four of us our own room at the Bellagio for 5-6 days. I remember having a 4500$ win at Bellagios 500$ cap 2-5 game... ran pretty salty. I only remember one hand worth bringing up, but I closed action and called 400$ pre with 67o with 3 others all in. Just flop 77X and send me the money. (Was drinking, gamble gamble). I cold called that also, some fish had opened massive and a 300$ stack just ripped a 400$ stack rejammed and I had called out of bb knowing fish will call off his 400~. This is actually a leak I have in poker. I will go over it because it has history.
Dating back to online my biggest leak was playing vs short stacks. Everyones biggest leak obv (6m setting). There were a few min buyers on Carbon and I got to the point I put them in pre every time they opened my bb from button, so long as they opened 75%+ from button or close to it. This has carried with me live, if I can gamble 3-4 ways (4 specifically) I will basically do it any time its 100bb~ or less with about 40% of hands if I can close action safely. I am a bit of a degenerate in this sense. I will flip for 1k if I have 10k to my name. It mostly came as a way to loosen up tables (the flipping blind preflop) at my local casino with players who give action. I am pretty snug in general but I cant refuse a flip when it presents itself and I cant refuse a fun gamble with short stacks.
I spend the month in Vegas during WSOP and run absurdly bad. Lose every big pot I play it seems. Switch to PLO the last half of the month and go a week straight without tripling my buy in up at any point. Just insane. Looking back I play rather poorly in PLO. I have been spoiled with my PLO games back home (which have been dead for about a year) and could get away with playing 50% of hands and no one ever bet big draws or anything not the nuts basically. I didnt adjust at all is what the issue was. Was just a frustrating month.
So I return and take a stake from a friend. I barely play still. Same ole same ole.
The last thing I will cover for this section is an incident late in 2018. One of the girls who is the floor at my local casino takes kratom also, we talk about it a fair amount. She has some 10mg percocets (mini oxycontins essentially) she gives me two of them. I havent had one in several years. I have been off methadone for 6-8 months at the time. I am eager to feel what I felt all those years ago, having no tolerance. So I take them home even though I know I shouldnt.
I get home and take both of them. What transpires is almost depressing. It frustrates me to no end that I realized that I have no desire for these. It affirms that all the money I flushed wasnt about the high, it was about the not withdrawing. I basically stated this in an earlier post but this is the event that I learned this from. I dont even enjoy it. I just sink knowing that I gave my life away for these. I have never recovered thanks to pain killers. Never once after 2011 have I ever looked in the mirror and said “finally, I have finally recovered what I fucked off”.
I am going to finish this thread off on the next post most likely. It will likely be long and take me a while to compose as it will cover my current year, and put a bow on it. The story basically climaxes a couple posts back, these surely have slowly lost their luster but I will finish them anyways. Nothing exciting about hearing about a guy who can beat games but wont sit in the chair to do it. Its a bit more upbeat in 2019 though and I feel my future is bright and redemption nears though. I dont think I would have written these if not for a change of mentality recently, so look forward to a positive summary next post.
submitted by cisheteropatriarchy to poker [link] [comments]

Rise and Fall Part 9.

Part 8 (has link to all before it, part 7 link has each individual link)
I expect this one to be the least popular one. Just wanted to be a cynic to open it up. I have been busy and this ones prob a bit sloppy, I didnt really proof read it or clean it up. The next one will likely be my last and hopefully the best one.
It is early 2017. I have been carrying on my usual playing 10-20 hours a week to survive. Still lethargic is best term I suppose. I just dont get excited to play anymore. I consider getting a job to remind me how shitty working is so it gives me a kick in the teeth to play poker. Then it dawns on me, I hate playing poker now.
Poker has been tainted. Everything bad that happened to me I can associate with poker. The rise and fall was poker (the fall part). The oxycontin started as a performance enhancer to log more hours. Everything I consider to be wrong in my life I trace back to poker essentially, even if just a butterfly affect reason that had I done something else I wouldnt be here.
Hating poker is not the greatest realization considering its my only means to income outside of grunt labor. I seek a job in a couple places to no avail which was fine, I didnt wanna do that either.
Several months earlier I had started playing on SWC (bitcoin site) and became familiarized with bitcoin. Thought nothing of it, it was just the currency I was winning or losing. I dont read a thing about it, I learn nothing of it. I wasnt playing a ton or even big stakes, my intention for playing online was to just stay sharp in case it ever comes back full fledge. I have 5-6 btc on this site at the most (2-3k) and I flush it playing plo and big o not thinking much of it.
Back to 2017. Its March/April~ of 2017. I am playing cards one night dicking around probably had a couple drinks and was needling the usuals etc. A guy I do not know is in the game. Looks Russian. I bet he interfered in our election... fucking commies. I dont remember how I got to talking to him but crypto had been brought up. I talk about SWC. Tell him I had a few btc but not anymore. The only other thing I remember well from the conversation was bitching about going from an iphone4 (yes I had an iphone4 from 2010-17, the same one. It barely worked. Many oxycontins snorted off the back of that phone, texts dating back to when I got it in 2010) to the 6 or 7 or wtfever I have now, which is bigger and its harder to text and drive. He just responds by saying “first world problems are the worst”. Amen brother, those Africans and Venezuelans have no clue of our struggle.
I end up talking to him a bit and it turns out he mines crypto. Has a website that sells mining equipment. He has a hell of a back story too. I tell him I am interested in mining. I have about 20k to my name at this time and I realized recently that I dont like playing poker so why not? He eventually tells me not to do it. Regardless we become friends and he is ultimately the most important friend I have ever made. I have made more positive strides mentally since meeting him (mostly work ethic, realizations, reality checks and aspirations) As silly as it sounds, when he told me “first world problems are the worst” it stuck with me. He was saying it as a joke but jokes are funniest when true. He is genuinely the smartest guy I have ever associated with also. If you run into him at a poker table youd think he was a high functioning autist. Then you talk to him and go “ohhh hes just one of those Einstein type geniuses”. His hair is usually a mess, he cuts his own hair for or has his girlfriend do it. He wears cheap clothing usually since it all covers your ass or nipples I suppose. He virtually never instigates conversation with people he doesnt know. He is really deliberate with his actions. Talks really calmly and knows exactly what he is saying. He is just on the same level at all times it seems.
Meeting him has definitely changed my life for the better. We become friends pretty quickly. I know I went on a downer after meeting him because I couldnt afford to buy mining stuff and remember wanting to (again, he told me not to do it eventually anyways).
Which will lead me to another good friend to have. Between 2015 and this point in 2017 I have shot myself in the foot not logging hours a couple times. A friend has bailed me out with a loan or short term stake a few times. He is a well off restaurant owner who loves poker more than just about anything not related to him. Every time I see him we talk about hands he played and he just eats it up, has photographic memory and never butchers a hand history which is nice. He is as good hearted of a guy as I have ever met. (Sorry if this is getting long winded giving praise to people close to me, I intend on sharing with a few people and would like them to know what they mean to me as corny as that is because I suck at doing it in real life. Plus it is kinda gay to get mushy sounding in real life, but I digress. Theyve heard virtually none of the content of this whole thread either, a ton of this stuff I have never shared) In fact he is too kind hearted. He has helped people who wouldnt piss on him if he was on fire, and people have burned him on many occasions. My only complaint about this person is he never kicked my ass and told me to log more hours or fuck off. I needed it. If I just logged hours I wouldnt need the help. Its as simple as that. I have no leaks other than the unwillingness to play (leaks as in drugs/pit games/strippers/wtf ever else) and it has hindered me immensely over the these last couple years. (Ok I do have one embarrassing leak that has been fixed for a year and change, mobile games... I have spent like 30,000$ on mobile games between late 2016 and late 2018, Lords Mobile specifically clocked me for 20k. This definitely hindered my ability to build a roll and got me into a few jams. When youre not logging hours playing youre sitting around gaming and these games arent cheap obviously)
It is around May now and my friend who messes with crypto tells me that Bitcoin is going to 10,000$. Its like 800$ at the time iirc. I own a couple from Ignition cashouts. I kind of trust him. I cant argue him on it as I have literally no mental fortitude on the subject, but I essentially shrug it off. I start watching the price on poloniex and am watching prices jump like crazy. Light bulb in head! I can buy the dips sell the peaks and have more BTC! Lets load the 2.5btc I have onto poloniex! Sell peak but it keeps climbing... “FUCK! gotta get it back before it goes to 10k! Whew. Still have 2.45 BTC. FUCK! Its dropping! Get it out before it goes to zero!”
Yea I turned that 2.5 BTC into .4 BTC. No joke. I think I ended up throwing it onto SWC and losing it once it was almost gone. I honestly forget. I had nothing when it finally hit 20k other than some shit alts worth about 800$ at most (worth 35$ now but they still reside in my locked poloniex account, maybe I will give poloniex my ID if they ever become worth more than 1k)
So I am now annoyed I didnt turn every free dollar I had into BTC. I didnt trust the guy enough and to be fair I would have been using the money I play with. Had I met the guy a year earlier (know what I know of him now) I would probably have just locked it all up and sat around waiting.
I never really get my act together in 2017. I continuously log just enough hours to get by. I just dont care. I just want a way out of this. I catch myself saying “I hate playing poker” and sometime around the end of 17 or early 2018 I start trying to censor myself and quit saying that. Saying it will only make it fester deeper. I have to retrain myself to love poker. I remember the days of playing 18-24 hours straight because I love playing. I love watching for everything I can find to get an edge. I love a situation to present itself where I can step out of line. But now I just sit down and count the minutes before I can tell myself “way to go! You put in an 8 hour shift lets pack it in!” I leave good games often times. I celebrate when games break. This is where I am mentally while I play. I cant break out of it.
Late in 2017 a close friend of mine passes away. Will call him J. He was the guy who gave me a place to stay after the shutdown in Joplin. I was still doing oxy and he never once touched the stuff knowing what has happened to me. He doesnt judge me, he is somewhat of an enabler I suppose. He just drinks does shitty coke sometimes and has a script of adderol and xanax. Literally never once does he do any with me (ive warned him xanax and opiates will kill you if you mix, which is likely part of the reason he never did it) He was a marginal poker player (relative to modern game, he was just good enough to beat the rake live but he had too many pit leaks) and took great pride in being my friend (I was the slayer in the area for years leading up to this, anyone considered the best in their area can relate, you just have the respect of the local poker community). One of my earlier live poker memories involved him. I am like 18 or 19 playing a 1-2 game at a small casino and he was there with a friend. They were the good players in the game at the time. They were having a few drinks eating nice food and laughing having a good time. I remember thinking that I want this lifestyle. Care free gambling fast paced lifestyle. I had told him this story years later and he just ate it up, constantly tried to get me to rebound, but as I have stated many many times in the last few of these I have basically waved my white flag and accepted the result of my fall.
Anyhow after living with him we always talk every few months at minimal and have something to eat when we see each other at the casino. He was somewhat disingenuous sounding he was so nice and honestly it got to a point it started rubbing me the wrong way. I still talk to him of course but less frequently. In December of 2017 I get a phone call from my friend who owns the restaurant and he is distraught. He has been at the hospital and J has passed away. The back story on this is he had gotten a phone call from old friend who was getting out of prison in Arizona with no where to go (a female). J being as nice a guy as he is drives the 20+ hours to get her and gives her a place to stay. Well shes a junky and actually convinces J to do opiates/heroin. He overdoses and dies. I hadnt talked to him in a few months. I regret it. Had I known I would have beaten him senseless and got him to quit before things actually get bad.
Going to his funeral hit me up side the head too. The way I started feeling he was disingenuous just got destroyed. I cant fathom as many people showing up to my funeral with as nice of things to say. I wrote something to say but opt out after a few people say everything I had written (except better). I regret not saying them anyways. I think I still have what I wrote tucked away with the card and his money clip that made its way to me. I stumbled across his casino players card in a box one day and it resides in my wallet ever since. This was the first close friend that has passed away in my life, knock on wood. It woke me up a bit and caused a lot of self reflection because I felt I had let him down. I lived a few miles from him and didnt drop in to see him, didnt stay in contact as well as I should have. All because I felt he was disingenuously nice when he was actually just nice, which is actually because I am a cynical hermit who hates social life these days. That was the real reason I didnt stay closer. Him being too nice was just my excuse to blow him off essentially.
Only other thing I can add is that chick he helped out didnt even go to his funeral and on top of that had tried to take his truck and clean his house out. Junkies are the worst. I was a junky but I proudly say I never robbed anyone or cost anyone anything other than emotional distress.
2018 starts and I have been decreasing my methadone every week for about 3-4 months now. I am on a low dose. Makes sleeping at night hard (get restless legs and sneezy). So I am having a few drinks any time I am at the casino playing (still just two days a week for the most part) to help get through those late night sessions when its worn off and I feel crummy. I get down to 15mg then 10mg and in March of 2018 I get asked if I wanna work for a week with my crypto friend. His friend is setting up a farm with 500 miners and needs help. I agree. The pay is in excess of the work (in my opinion) at 3k and I have no expenses, but I dont argue obviously. Before we leave town I have to pick up my week of methadone (at 4mg now) and so I do that. I never take any of them, I have the box still. Never opened it. They remain at my apartment as a reminder, the box carrying the 6 doses and a stack of receipts for every 75$ week that I kept in the box, several years worth, at least 9-10k worth of receipts, and that shits CHEAP compared to oxy. So I am finally off of opiates. I take kratom still but its essentially non addictive in comparison. Ill cede that I am reliant on kratom but if it disappeared tomorrow I wouldnt panic, I would be fine.
So I fly to Denver with my friend and meet his friends half brother who was instructed to rent a box truck and the three of us were to drive from Denver to Washington carrying like half a million dollars worth of hardware. Its early March, the roads arent exactly great. Half brother of his friend rents a truck with no middle seat though. Its absolutely miserable. Whoever sat middle was sitting like a fem boy legs closed and knees up high from the drive shaft hump. It was un fucking real how uncomfortable the middle was. So like I stated the roads were not great, we drove on ice for 5-6 hours straight (while my crypto friend did about 30 minutes of it before I decided I value my life and banned him from driving, he was literally doing over 70 on this ice sheet when I checked the gauge. I forget what he said, I will fail to make it sound as good but he said that he is protected and can not die, if we wreck he wont get hurt because of some universe stipulation that protects him. He said we would get hurt but he wouldnt. (I will have him tell me this stuff again and leave it in comments, it was pretty funny and I kinda want to think he believes what he said as it was clearly not something he just came up with).
I end up driving like 18 of the 24 (one shot) hours it took as letting crypto friend drive was out. We make it set up a farm over a couple days then we go to Vegas. Not only do we go to Vegas but we fly a private jet. Not only do we take a private jet but his buddy has all four of us our own room at the Bellagio for 5-6 days. I remember having a 4500$ win at Bellagios 500$ cap 2-5 game... ran pretty salty. I only remember one hand worth bringing up, but I closed action and called 400$ pre with 67o with 3 others all in. Just flop 77X and send me the money. (Was drinking, gamble gamble). I cold called that also, some fish had opened massive and a 300$ stack just ripped a 400$ stack rejammed and I had called out of bb knowing fish will call off his 400~. This is actually a leak I have in poker. I will go over it because it has history.
Dating back to online my biggest leak was playing vs short stacks. Everyones biggest leak obv (6m setting). There were a few min buyers on Carbon and I got to the point I put them in pre every time they opened my bb from button, so long as they opened 75%+ from button or close to it. This has carried with me live, if I can gamble 3-4 ways (4 specifically) I will basically do it any time its 100bb~ or less with about 40% of hands if I can close action safely. I am a bit of a degenerate in this sense. I will flip for 1k if I have 10k to my name. It mostly came as a way to loosen up tables (the flipping blind preflop) at my local casino with players who give action. I am pretty snug in general but I cant refuse a flip when it presents itself and I cant refuse a fun gamble with short stacks.
I spend the month in Vegas during WSOP and run absurdly bad. Lose every big pot I play it seems. Switch to PLO the last half of the month and go a week straight without tripling my buy in up at any point. Just insane. Looking back I play rather poorly in PLO. I have been spoiled with my PLO games back home (which have been dead for about a year) and could get away with playing 50% of hands and no one ever bet big draws or anything not the nuts basically. I didnt adjust at all is what the issue was. Was just a frustrating month.
So I return and take a stake from a friend. I barely play still. Same ole same ole.
The last thing I will cover for this section is an incident late in 2018. One of the girls who is the floor at my local casino takes kratom also, we talk about it a fair amount. She has some 10mg percocets (mini oxycontins essentially) she gives me two of them. I havent had one in several years. I have been off methadone for 6-8 months at the time. I am eager to feel what I felt all those years ago, having no tolerance. So I take them home even though I know I shouldnt.
I get home and take both of them. What transpires is almost depressing. It frustrates me to no end that I realized that I have no desire for these. It affirms that all the money I flushed wasnt about the high, it was about the not withdrawing. I basically stated this in an earlier post but this is the event that I learned this from. I dont even enjoy it. I just sink knowing that I gave my life away for these. I have never recovered thanks to pain killers. Never once after 2011 have I ever looked in the mirror and said “finally, I have finally recovered what I fucked off”.
I am going to finish this thread off on the next post most likely. It will likely be long and take me a while to compose as it will cover my current year, and put a bow on it. The story basically climaxes a couple posts back, these surely have slowly lost their luster but I will finish them anyways. Nothing exciting about hearing about a guy who can beat games but wont sit in the chair to do it. Its a bit more upbeat in 2019 though and I feel my future is bright and redemption nears though. I dont think I would have written these if not for a change of mentality recently, so look forward to a positive summary next post.
submitted by cisheteropatriarchy to poker [link] [comments]

Rise and Fall Part 9.

Part 8 (has link to all before it, part 7 link has each individual link)
I expect this one to be the least popular one. Just wanted to be a cynic to open it up. I have been busy and this ones prob a bit sloppy, I didnt really proof read it or clean it up. The next one will likely be my last and hopefully the best one.
It is early 2017. I have been carrying on my usual playing 10-20 hours a week to survive. Still lethargic is best term I suppose. I just dont get excited to play anymore. I consider getting a job to remind me how shitty working is so it gives me a kick in the teeth to play poker. Then it dawns on me, I hate playing poker now.
Poker has been tainted. Everything bad that happened to me I can associate with poker. The rise and fall was poker (the fall part). The oxycontin started as a performance enhancer to log more hours. Everything I consider to be wrong in my life I trace back to poker essentially, even if just a butterfly affect reason that had I done something else I wouldnt be here.
Hating poker is not the greatest realization considering its my only means to income outside of grunt labor. I seek a job in a couple places to no avail which was fine, I didnt wanna do that either.
Several months earlier I had started playing on SWC (bitcoin site) and became familiarized with bitcoin. Thought nothing of it, it was just the currency I was winning or losing. I dont read a thing about it, I learn nothing of it. I wasnt playing a ton or even big stakes, my intention for playing online was to just stay sharp in case it ever comes back full fledge. I have 5-6 btc on this site at the most (2-3k) and I flush it playing plo and big o not thinking much of it.
Back to 2017. Its March/April~ of 2017. I am playing cards one night dicking around probably had a couple drinks and was needling the usuals etc. A guy I do not know is in the game. Looks Russian. I bet he interfered in our election... fucking commies. I dont remember how I got to talking to him but crypto had been brought up. I talk about SWC. Tell him I had a few btc but not anymore. The only other thing I remember well from the conversation was bitching about going from an iphone4 (yes I had an iphone4 from 2010-17, the same one. It barely worked. Many oxycontins snorted off the back of that phone, texts dating back to when I got it in 2010) to the 6 or 7 or wtfever I have now, which is bigger and its harder to text and drive. He just responds by saying “first world problems are the worst”. Amen brother, those Africans and Venezuelans have no clue of our struggle.
I end up talking to him a bit and it turns out he mines crypto. Has a website that sells mining equipment. He has a hell of a back story too. I tell him I am interested in mining. I have about 20k to my name at this time and I realized recently that I dont like playing poker so why not? He eventually tells me not to do it. Regardless we become friends and he is ultimately the most important friend I have ever made. I have made more positive strides mentally since meeting him (mostly work ethic, realizations, reality checks and aspirations) As silly as it sounds, when he told me “first world problems are the worst” it stuck with me. He was saying it as a joke but jokes are funniest when true. He is genuinely the smartest guy I have ever associated with also. If you run into him at a poker table youd think he was a high functioning autist. Then you talk to him and go “ohhh hes just one of those Einstein type geniuses”. His hair is usually a mess, he cuts his own hair for or has his girlfriend do it. He wears cheap clothing usually since it all covers your ass or nipples I suppose. He virtually never instigates conversation with people he doesnt know. He is really deliberate with his actions. Talks really calmly and knows exactly what he is saying. He is just on the same level at all times it seems.
Meeting him has definitely changed my life for the better. We become friends pretty quickly. I know I went on a downer after meeting him because I couldnt afford to buy mining stuff and remember wanting to (again, he told me not to do it eventually anyways).
Which will lead me to another good friend to have. Between 2015 and this point in 2017 I have shot myself in the foot not logging hours a couple times. A friend has bailed me out with a loan or short term stake a few times. He is a well off restaurant owner who loves poker more than just about anything not related to him. Every time I see him we talk about hands he played and he just eats it up, has photographic memory and never butchers a hand history which is nice. He is as good hearted of a guy as I have ever met. (Sorry if this is getting long winded giving praise to people close to me, I intend on sharing with a few people and would like them to know what they mean to me as corny as that is because I suck at doing it in real life. Plus it is kinda gay to get mushy sounding in real life, but I digress. Theyve heard virtually none of the content of this whole thread either, a ton of this stuff I have never shared) In fact he is too kind hearted. He has helped people who wouldnt piss on him if he was on fire, and people have burned him on many occasions. My only complaint about this person is he never kicked my ass and told me to log more hours or fuck off. I needed it. If I just logged hours I wouldnt need the help. Its as simple as that. I have no leaks other than the unwillingness to play (leaks as in drugs/pit games/strippers/wtf ever else) and it has hindered me immensely over the these last couple years. (Ok I do have one embarrassing leak that has been fixed for a year and change, mobile games... I have spent like 30,000$ on mobile games between late 2016 and late 2018, Lords Mobile specifically clocked me for 20k. This definitely hindered my ability to build a roll and got me into a few jams. When youre not logging hours playing youre sitting around gaming and these games arent cheap obviously)
It is around May now and my friend who messes with crypto tells me that Bitcoin is going to 10,000$. Its like 800$ at the time iirc. I own a couple from Ignition cashouts. I kind of trust him. I cant argue him on it as I have literally no mental fortitude on the subject, but I essentially shrug it off. I start watching the price on poloniex and am watching prices jump like crazy. Light bulb in head! I can buy the dips sell the peaks and have more BTC! Lets load the 2.5btc I have onto poloniex! Sell peak but it keeps climbing... “FUCK! gotta get it back before it goes to 10k! Whew. Still have 2.45 BTC. FUCK! Its dropping! Get it out before it goes to zero!”
Yea I turned that 2.5 BTC into .4 BTC. No joke. I think I ended up throwing it onto SWC and losing it once it was almost gone. I honestly forget. I had nothing when it finally hit 20k other than some shit alts worth about 800$ at most (worth 35$ now but they still reside in my locked poloniex account, maybe I will give poloniex my ID if they ever become worth more than 1k)
So I am now annoyed I didnt turn every free dollar I had into BTC. I didnt trust the guy enough and to be fair I would have been using the money I play with. Had I met the guy a year earlier (know what I know of him now) I would probably have just locked it all up and sat around waiting.
I never really get my act together in 2017. I continuously log just enough hours to get by. I just dont care. I just want a way out of this. I catch myself saying “I hate playing poker” and sometime around the end of 17 or early 2018 I start trying to censor myself and quit saying that. Saying it will only make it fester deeper. I have to retrain myself to love poker. I remember the days of playing 18-24 hours straight because I love playing. I love watching for everything I can find to get an edge. I love a situation to present itself where I can step out of line. But now I just sit down and count the minutes before I can tell myself “way to go! You put in an 8 hour shift lets pack it in!” I leave good games often times. I celebrate when games break. This is where I am mentally while I play. I cant break out of it.
Late in 2017 a close friend of mine passes away. Will call him J. He was the guy who gave me a place to stay after the shutdown in Joplin. I was still doing oxy and he never once touched the stuff knowing what has happened to me. He doesnt judge me, he is somewhat of an enabler I suppose. He just drinks does shitty coke sometimes and has a script of adderol and xanax. Literally never once does he do any with me (ive warned him xanax and opiates will kill you if you mix, which is likely part of the reason he never did it) He was a marginal poker player (relative to modern game, he was just good enough to beat the rake live but he had too many pit leaks) and took great pride in being my friend (I was the slayer in the area for years leading up to this, anyone considered the best in their area can relate, you just have the respect of the local poker community). One of my earlier live poker memories involved him. I am like 18 or 19 playing a 1-2 game at a small casino and he was there with a friend. They were the good players in the game at the time. They were having a few drinks eating nice food and laughing having a good time. I remember thinking that I want this lifestyle. Care free gambling fast paced lifestyle. I had told him this story years later and he just ate it up, constantly tried to get me to rebound, but as I have stated many many times in the last few of these I have basically waved my white flag and accepted the result of my fall.
Anyhow after living with him we always talk every few months at minimal and have something to eat when we see each other at the casino. He was somewhat disingenuous sounding he was so nice and honestly it got to a point it started rubbing me the wrong way. I still talk to him of course but less frequently. In December of 2017 I get a phone call from my friend who owns the restaurant and he is distraught. He has been at the hospital and J has passed away. The back story on this is he had gotten a phone call from old friend who was getting out of prison in Arizona with no where to go (a female). J being as nice a guy as he is drives the 20+ hours to get her and gives her a place to stay. Well shes a junky and actually convinces J to do opiates/heroin. He overdoses and dies. I hadnt talked to him in a few months. I regret it. Had I known I would have beaten him senseless and got him to quit before things actually get bad.
Going to his funeral hit me up side the head too. The way I started feeling he was disingenuous just got destroyed. I cant fathom as many people showing up to my funeral with as nice of things to say. I wrote something to say but opt out after a few people say everything I had written (except better). I regret not saying them anyways. I think I still have what I wrote tucked away with the card and his money clip that made its way to me. I stumbled across his casino players card in a box one day and it resides in my wallet ever since. This was the first close friend that has passed away in my life, knock on wood. It woke me up a bit and caused a lot of self reflection because I felt I had let him down. I lived a few miles from him and didnt drop in to see him, didnt stay in contact as well as I should have. All because I felt he was disingenuously nice when he was actually just nice, which is actually because I am a cynical hermit who hates social life these days. That was the real reason I didnt stay closer. Him being too nice was just my excuse to blow him off essentially.
Only other thing I can add is that chick he helped out didnt even go to his funeral and on top of that had tried to take his truck and clean his house out. Junkies are the worst. I was a junky but I proudly say I never robbed anyone or cost anyone anything other than emotional distress.
2018 starts and I have been decreasing my methadone every week for about 3-4 months now. I am on a low dose. Makes sleeping at night hard (get restless legs and sneezy). So I am having a few drinks any time I am at the casino playing (still just two days a week for the most part) to help get through those late night sessions when its worn off and I feel crummy. I get down to 15mg then 10mg and in March of 2018 I get asked if I wanna work for a week with my crypto friend. His friend is setting up a farm with 500 miners and needs help. I agree. The pay is in excess of the work (in my opinion) at 3k and I have no expenses, but I dont argue obviously. Before we leave town I have to pick up my week of methadone (at 4mg now) and so I do that. I never take any of them, I have the box still. Never opened it. They remain at my apartment as a reminder, the box carrying the 6 doses and a stack of receipts for every 75$ week that I kept in the box, several years worth, at least 9-10k worth of receipts, and that shits CHEAP compared to oxy. So I am finally off of opiates. I take kratom still but its essentially non addictive in comparison. Ill cede that I am reliant on kratom but if it disappeared tomorrow I wouldnt panic, I would be fine.
So I fly to Denver with my friend and meet his friends half brother who was instructed to rent a box truck and the three of us were to drive from Denver to Washington carrying like half a million dollars worth of hardware. Its early March, the roads arent exactly great. Half brother of his friend rents a truck with no middle seat though. Its absolutely miserable. Whoever sat middle was sitting like a fem boy legs closed and knees up high from the drive shaft hump. It was un fucking real how uncomfortable the middle was. So like I stated the roads were not great, we drove on ice for 5-6 hours straight (while my crypto friend did about 30 minutes of it before I decided I value my life and banned him from driving, he was literally doing over 70 on this ice sheet when I checked the gauge. I forget what he said, I will fail to make it sound as good but he said that he is protected and can not die, if we wreck he wont get hurt because of some universe stipulation that protects him. He said we would get hurt but he wouldnt. (I will have him tell me this stuff again and leave it in comments, it was pretty funny and I kinda want to think he believes what he said as it was clearly not something he just came up with).
I end up driving like 18 of the 24 (one shot) hours it took as letting crypto friend drive was out. We make it set up a farm over a couple days then we go to Vegas. Not only do we go to Vegas but we fly a private jet. Not only do we take a private jet but his buddy has all four of us our own room at the Bellagio for 5-6 days. I remember having a 4500$ win at Bellagios 500$ cap 2-5 game... ran pretty salty. I only remember one hand worth bringing up, but I closed action and called 400$ pre with 67o with 3 others all in. Just flop 77X and send me the money. (Was drinking, gamble gamble). I cold called that also, some fish had opened massive and a 300$ stack just ripped a 400$ stack rejammed and I had called out of bb knowing fish will call off his 400~. This is actually a leak I have in poker. I will go over it because it has history.
Dating back to online my biggest leak was playing vs short stacks. Everyones biggest leak obv (6m setting). There were a few min buyers on Carbon and I got to the point I put them in pre every time they opened my bb from button, so long as they opened 75%+ from button or close to it. This has carried with me live, if I can gamble 3-4 ways (4 specifically) I will basically do it any time its 100bb~ or less with about 40% of hands if I can close action safely. I am a bit of a degenerate in this sense. I will flip for 1k if I have 10k to my name. It mostly came as a way to loosen up tables (the flipping blind preflop) at my local casino with players who give action. I am pretty snug in general but I cant refuse a flip when it presents itself and I cant refuse a fun gamble with short stacks.
I spend the month in Vegas during WSOP and run absurdly bad. Lose every big pot I play it seems. Switch to PLO the last half of the month and go a week straight without tripling my buy in up at any point. Just insane. Looking back I play rather poorly in PLO. I have been spoiled with my PLO games back home (which have been dead for about a year) and could get away with playing 50% of hands and no one ever bet big draws or anything not the nuts basically. I didnt adjust at all is what the issue was. Was just a frustrating month.
So I return and take a stake from a friend. I barely play still. Same ole same ole.
The last thing I will cover for this section is an incident late in 2018. One of the girls who is the floor at my local casino takes kratom also, we talk about it a fair amount. She has some 10mg percocets (mini oxycontins essentially) she gives me two of them. I havent had one in several years. I have been off methadone for 6-8 months at the time. I am eager to feel what I felt all those years ago, having no tolerance. So I take them home even though I know I shouldnt.
I get home and take both of them. What transpires is almost depressing. It frustrates me to no end that I realized that I have no desire for these. It affirms that all the money I flushed wasnt about the high, it was about the not withdrawing. I basically stated this in an earlier post but this is the event that I learned this from. I dont even enjoy it. I just sink knowing that I gave my life away for these. I have never recovered thanks to pain killers. Never once after 2011 have I ever looked in the mirror and said “finally, I have finally recovered what I fucked off”.
I am going to finish this thread off on the next post most likely. It will likely be long and take me a while to compose as it will cover my current year, and put a bow on it. The story basically climaxes a couple posts back, these surely have slowly lost their luster but I will finish them anyways. Nothing exciting about hearing about a guy who can beat games but wont sit in the chair to do it. Its a bit more upbeat in 2019 though and I feel my future is bright and redemption nears though. I dont think I would have written these if not for a change of mentality recently, so look forward to a positive summary next post.
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